Editing Treehouse of Horror IX (section)

==Plot==
===Opening sequence===
The opening sequence is exactly the same as normal, but with a dark twist, as [[Bart Simpson|Bart]] does the chalkboard lines in red paint, and then the entire family is killed one by one as they arrive home (Bart falls off his skateboard when he lands on the car, [[Lisa Simpson|Lisa]] is catapulted into the garage wall when she strikes Bart in the driveway, and [[Homer Simpson|Homer]] is crushed by [[Marge Simpson|Marge]] and [[Maggie Simpson|Maggie]], who presumably also die in the crash). On the couch, [[Freddy Krueger]] and [[Jason Voorhees]] are waiting for them and wonder where they are.

==="Hell Toupée"===
In a parody of the ''[[Amazing Stories (1985 TV series)|Amazing Stories]]'' episode "Hell Toupee",<ref>{{Cite web|last=Dessem|first=Matthew|date=2020-03-14|title=The Episodes of Amazing Stories That Are Actually Worth Watching|url=https://slate.com/culture/2020/03/amazing-stories-apple-tv-best-episodes-original-spielberg-series.html|access-date=2020-10-17|website=Slate Magazine|language=en}}</ref> [[Snake Jailbird|Snake]] is arrested for smoking inside the [[Kwik-E-Mart]]. [[Chief Wiggum]] explains that this is Snake's third strike, so he will be [[execution (legal)|executed]] in accordance with the [[three strikes law]]. Before hauling Snake away, Chief Wiggum points out that [[Apu Nahasapeemapetilon|Apu]], [[Moe Szyslak|Moe]], and Bart are all witnesses; Snake vows to kill them all.

After the execution, which happens on live TV, Homer visits [[Dr. Nick (The Simpsons)|Dr. Nick]], who transplants Snake's hair onto Homer's head. When Homer goes to sleep the following night, it plants its roots in Homer's brain. With the hair [[Brainwashing|controlling his mind]], Homer murders both Apu and Moe. Bart realizes that the other two witnesses have been killed, and Homer vows to protect him. Homer locks himself and Bart in a room, but Snake's hair takes control of him. Homer tries to kill Bart with a [[sledgehammer]]. Bart begs Homer to fight the hair. After a struggle, Homer rips the hair off his head. However, the scalp comes to life, attempting to suffocate Bart whilst Homer ineffectually punches it, if anything hurting Bart. Wiggum bursts in and shoots the hair dead, then wryly comments on how it has been "a bad hair day", causing everyone to laugh. Marge tries to remind everyone about the two murders, but then suddenly gets the joke and joins in.

==="The Terror of Tiny Toon"===
In a parody of ''[[Stay Tuned (film)|Stay Tuned]]'',<ref>{{Cite web|date=2019-10-30|title=13 Great Simpsons Treehouse of Horror Halloween Stories|url=https://www.denofgeek.com/tv/13-great-simpsons-treehouse-of-horror-halloween-stories/|access-date=2020-10-17|website=Den of Geek|language=en-US}}</ref> Marge forbids Bart and Lisa from watching the ''[[The Itchy & Scratchy Show|Itchy & Scratchy]]'' Halloween special while she goes trick-or-treating with Maggie, removing the batteries from the remote control. When Marge leaves, Bart finds [[plutonium]] in Homer's toolbox and hammers it into the remote's battery slot. When they use the remote, the kids enter the world of ''Itchy and Scratchy'', and begin to laugh at their antics, angering the cat-and-mouse duo, who proceed to hunt them to teach them a lesson.

Back in the Simpson house, Homer enters the living room and watches the show. Oblivious to what he sees, Homer decides to change the channel and Bart, Lisa, Itchy, and Scratchy wind up on ''[[Live with Kelly and Ryan|Live with Regis and Kathie Lee]]''. They disrupt the cooking segment of the show with [[Regis Philbin]] and [[Kathie Lee Gifford]], causing Gifford to call it a day while stating that [[Dom DeLuise]] can interview himself. Bart, Lisa, Itchy, and Scratchy then end up back at Itchy's house. They urge Homer from inside the TV to use the remote to get them out, and he eventually succeeds just as Marge and Maggie arrive home.

Unfortunately, Itchy and Scratchy also escape. At first, the family is screaming in horror, but soon realize how small the pair actually are, and decide to keep them as pets. After seeing Scratchy fall in love with [[Snowball II]], Marge decides to have him neutered, much to his horror.

==="Starship Poopers"===
Marge discovers Maggie's first baby tooth, which appears to be a sharp fang. Maggie later loses her legs and sprouts green [[tentacle]]s. Maggie's pacifier sucks contact the alien duo [[Kang and Kodos]]. They arrive at the Simpson house, coming to retrieve Maggie. Marge reveals that Kang is Maggie's real father and explains how it happened.

Kang and Kodos demand that the Simpsons give Maggie to them, but Homer refuses which starts a big fight between Kang and Homer until Bart suggests that they appear on ''[[The Jerry Springer Show]]'' to resolve their issues. When an audience member criticizes Kang, he vaporizes her, as well as the rest of the audience and the film crew. Everyone looks guiltily as host [[Jerry Springer]] does a monologue encouraging them to put their differences aside and do what is best for Maggie. However, Maggie attacks Springer, killing him, causing Kang and Homer to fight again, much to Marge's embarrassment.

After leaving the studio, Kang and Kodos threaten to destroy every politician in [[Washington D.C.|Washington]] unless given Maggie. Marge slyly implies that the aliens could not possibly destroy ''every'' politician, and they fly off to do so. As the Simpsons prepare to head home, Maggie says in Kang's voice that she will drive, and laughs diabolically before stating that she needs blood as the credits begin.