Editing Polyamory (section)

==As a practice==
{{See also|Polyamory in the United States}}

[[File:Pride in London 2016 - Polyamorous people in the parade.png|thumb|left|Polyamorous people parading under their banner with two [[Furry fandom|furries]] in front of them at Pride in London 2016]]
[[Consensual non-monogamy]], which polyamory falls under,<ref>{{cite web |url=https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201807/what-is-the-difference-between-polyamory-and-polygamy |title=What Is the Difference Between Polyamory and Polygamy? |last=Sheff |first=Elisabeth A. |date=July 26, 2018 |website=[[Psychology Today]] |access-date=December 24, 2020 |archive-url=https://archive.today/20201225020408/https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201807/what-is-the-difference-between-polyamory-and-polygamy |archive-date=December 25, 2020 |url-status=live }}</ref> can take many different forms, depending on the needs and preferences of the individual(s) involved in any specific relationship(s). As of 2019, over one-fifth of single Americans have, at some point in their lives, engaged in some sort of consensual non-monogamy.<ref>{{Cite journal|last1=Haupert|first1=M. L.|last2=Gesselman|first2=Amanda N.|last3=Moors|first3=Amy C.|last4=Fisher|first4=Helen E.|last5=Garcia|first5=Justin R.|s2cid=6855648|date=2017-07-04|title=Prevalence of Experiences With Consensual Nonmonogamous Relationships: Findings From Two National Samples of Single Americans|journal=Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy|volume=43|issue=5|pages=424–440|doi=10.1080/0092623X.2016.1178675|issn=0092-623X|pmid=27096488}}</ref>

Separate from polyamory as a philosophical basis for relationships are the practical ways in which people who live polyamorously arrange their lives and handle specific issues compared to those of a more conventional monogamous arrangement.<ref name=":3"/> People of different [[sexual orientations]] are a part of the community and form networks of relationships with the consent and agreement of their partners.<ref>{{Cite book|title=Introducing the New Sexuality Studies|publisher=Routledge|year=2016|editor-last=Ficher|editor-first=Nancy|edition=third|location=New York, NY|page=326|chapter=Contesting the Culture of Monogamy|editor-last2=Seidman|editor-first2=Steven}}</ref><ref name="weiger">{{cite journal|last1=Weitzman|first1=Geri|title=Therapy with Clients Who Are Bisexual and Polyamorous|journal=Journal of Bisexuality|date=2006|volume=6|issue=1–2|pages=137–164|doi=10.1300/J159v06n01_08|s2cid=143967318|url=http://www.numenor.org/~gdw/psychologist/bipolycounseling.html|access-date=December 4, 2006|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20150318053259/http://www.numenor.org/~gdw/psychologist/bipolycounseling.html|archive-date=March 18, 2015|url-status=dead}}</ref><ref>{{cite web |last1=Strassberg |first1=Maura I. |url=https://culsnet.law.capital.edu/LawReview/BackIssues/31-3/Strassberg14.pdf |title=The Challenge Of Post-Modern Polygamy: Considering Polyamory |url-status=dead |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20060524030716/https://culsnet.law.capital.edu/LawReview/BackIssues/31-3/Strassberg14.pdf |archive-date=May 24, 2006}}</ref> Many things differentiate polyamory from other types of non-monogamous relationships. It is common for [[Swinging (sexual practice)|swinging]] and [[Open relationship|open couples]] to maintain emotional monogamy while engaging in extra-dyadic sexual relations.{{sfn |Barker |Langdridge |2012 |loc=Swinging: Pushing the Boundaries of Monogamy?|p=71}}

The friend or partner boundary in monogamous relationships and other forms of non-monogamy is typically fairly clear. Unlike other forms of non-monogamy, though, "polyamory is notable for privileging emotional intimacy with others."<ref name="Brunning 2016"/> Benefits of a polyamorous relationship might include:<ref>{{cite web |website=PolyamoryOnline |url=http://www.polyamoryonline.org/articles/polyamoury_101.html |title=Polyamory 101 |access-date=April 27, 2007 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20070928045712/http://www.polyamoryonline.org/articles/polyamoury_101.html |archive-date=September 28, 2007 |url-status=live |date=2007 }}</ref> the ability of individuals to discuss issues with multiple partners, potentially mediating and thus stabilizing a relationship, and reducing polarization of viewpoints, and emotional support and structure from other committed adults within the familial unit. Other benefits include a wider range of adult experience, skills, resources, and perspective and support for companionate marriages, which can be satisfying even if no longer sexually vital since romantic needs are met elsewhere. This acts to preserve existing relationships.<ref>{{cite web|title = The Chicago School of Professional Psychology|url = http://ego.thechicagoschool.edu/s/843/images/editor_documents/What%2520therapists%2520should%2520know%2520about%2520Polyamory.pdf|archive-url = https://web.archive.org/web/20130919142325/http://ego.thechicagoschool.edu/s/843/images/editor_documents/What%20therapists%20should%20know%20about%20Polyamory.pdf|url-status = dead|archive-date = September 19, 2013|website = ego.thechicagoschool.edu|access-date = August 30, 2015}}</ref>

The [[Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction]] estimated that there were half a million "openly polyamorous families" in the United States in July 2009.<ref name="bennett">{{cite web |url=https://www.newsweek.com/polyamory-next-sexual-revolution-82053 |title=Polyamory: The Next Sexual Revolution? |last=Bennett |first=Jessica |date=July 29, 2009 |website=[[Newsweek]] |access-date=December 23, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201104142851/https://www.newsweek.com/polyamory-next-sexual-revolution-82053 |archive-date=November 4, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref><ref>{{cite web |url=https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19125591-800-love-unlimited-the-polyamorists/ |title=Love Unlimited: The Polyamorists |author=[[Annalee Newitz|Newitz, Annalee]] |date=July 7, 2006 |website=[[New Scientist]] |access-date=December 23, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201109025921/https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19125591-800-love-unlimited-the-polyamorists/ |archive-date=November 9, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref> Additionally, 15–28% of heterosexual couples and about half of gay and bisexual people have a "non-traditional" arrangement of some kind as reported in ''[[The Guardian]]'' in August 2013.<ref>{{cite web |url=https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/aug/20/polyamorous-shows-no-traditional-way-live |title=Being polyamorous shows there's no 'traditional' way to live |last=Penny |first=Laurie |date=August 20, 2013 |website=[[The Guardian]] |access-date=December 23, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201112015040/https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/aug/20/polyamorous-shows-no-traditional-way-live |archive-date=November 12, 2020 |url-status=live }}</ref> Polyamorous communities have been said to be outwardly [[feminist]] as women were central to the creation of such communities and [[gender equality]] is a central tenet.<ref name="bennett" /> For those who are polyamorous, [[social distancing]], as a result of the [[COVID-19 pandemic]], created ripples in existing relationships, leading some to split apart and others to struggle to maintain their connections with one another.<ref>{{cite web |url=https://mashable.com/article/polyamory-during-quarantine-coronavirus/ |title=What it's like to be polyamorous during the coronavirus quarantine |last=Iovine |first=Anna |date=April 19, 2020 |website=[[Mashable]] |access-date=December 24, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20200419155421/https://mashable.com/article/polyamory-during-quarantine-coronavirus/ |archive-date=April 19, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref><ref>{{cite web |url=https://www.self.com/story/non-monogamous-pandemic-dating |title=9 Ways Non-Monogamous People Are Dealing With the Pandemic |last=Smith |first=Gabrielle |date=August 7, 2020 |website=[[Self (magazine)|Self]] |access-date=December 24, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201129144827/https://www.self.com/story/non-monogamous-pandemic-dating |archive-date=November 29, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref><ref>{{cite web |url=https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/polyamory-pandemic-1.5608920 |title=Polyamory during a pandemic? It's complicated |last=Migdal |first=Alex |date=2020-06-14 |website=[[CBC News]] |access-date=December 24, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20200809093453/https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/polyamory-pandemic-1.5608920 |archive-date=August 9, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref>

=== Fidelity and loyalty ===
[[File:Polyamorie.jpg|thumb|left|Three people in a polyamorous relationship.]]
A large percentage of polyamorists define ''fidelity'' not as sexual exclusivity, but as faithfulness to the promises and agreements made about a relationship.<ref>{{Cite journal|last=Zhu|first=Jingshu|date=January 2018|title=We're Not Cheaters: Polyamory, Mixed-Orientation Marriage and the Construction of Radical Honesty|journal=Social Science|url=http://gjss.org/sites/default/files/issues/chapters/papers/GjSS%20Vol%2014-1%20Zhu.pdf|access-date=December 24, 2020|volume=14|issue=1|archive-date=February 28, 2021|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20210228062959/http://gjss.org/sites/default/files/issues/chapters/papers/GjSS%20Vol%2014-1%20Zhu.pdf|url-status=live}}</ref><ref>{{cite news |last=Sudeep |first=Theres |date=November 28, 2020 |title=In Bengaluru, many couples are exploring polyamory |url=https://www.deccanherald.com/metrolife/metrolife-your-bond-with-bengaluru/in-bengaluru-many-couples-are-exploring-polyamory-920842.html |work=[[Deccan Herald]] |location=[[Bangalore]], [[Karnataka]], [[India]] |access-date=December 11, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201204102811/https://www.deccanherald.com/metrolife/metrolife-your-bond-with-bengaluru/in-bengaluru-many-couples-are-exploring-polyamory-920842.html |archive-date=December 4, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref><ref name="cook">{{cite journal |last1=Cook |first1=Elaine |date=December 12, 2005 |title=Commitment in Polyamory |url=http://www.ejhs.org/volume8/cook1.htm |journal=[[Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality]] |volume=8 |access-date=December 23, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201127014452/http://www.ejhs.org/volume8/cook1.htm |archive-date=November 27, 2020 }}</ref> As a relational practice, polyamory sustains a vast variety of open relationship or multi-partner constellations, which can differ in definition and grades of intensity, closeness and commitment.<ref name="Fidelity">{{cite journal|last1=Klesse|first1=Christian|s2cid=144546531|title=Polyamory: Intimate practice, identity or sexual orientation?|journal=Sexualities|date=February 5, 2014|volume=17|issue=1–2|page=81|doi=10.1177/1363460713511096|url=https://e-space.mmu.ac.uk/607287/2/Polyorientation%20CK%20110102013final..pdf|access-date=March 12, 2020|archive-date=June 29, 2021|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20210629232415/https://e-space.mmu.ac.uk/607287/2/Polyorientation%20CK%20110102013final..pdf|url-status=live}}</ref> Specifically, 
polyamory can take the forms of a [[Ménage à trois|triad]]{{efn|The term "triad" for this type of arrangement was coined by [[Isaac Asimov]] in his 1972 novel ''[[The Gods Themselves]]''.}} of three people in an intimate relationship, a poly family of more than three people, one person as the pivot point of a relationship (a "vee"), a couple in a two-person relationship which portrays other relationships on their own, and various other intimate networks of individuals.<ref name="weiger" /><ref name="bennett" /><ref name="davidson">{{cite journal |last1=Davidson |first1=Joy |date=April 16, 2002 |title=Working with Polyamorous Clients in the Clinical Setting |url=http://www.ejhs.org/volume5/polyoutline.html |journal=[[Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality]] |volume=5 |access-date=December 23, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20200919075803/http://www.ejhs.org/volume5/polyoutline.html |archive-date=September 19, 2020 }} Also delivered to the [[Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality]], Western Regional Conference, April 2002.</ref> There are also those who are swingers and engage in polyamory or engage in poly-dating.<ref name="davidson" /> A poly family is sometimes called '''kitchen table polyamory''',<ref>{{cite web |url=https://torontolife.com/city/how-a-polyamorous-toronto-man-is-managing-his-four-romantic-relationships-remotely/ |title=How a polyamorous Toronto man is managing his four romantic relationships remotely |last=Slone |first=Isabel B. |date=June 9, 2020 |website=Toronto Life |access-date=December 24, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20200702082808/https://torontolife.com/city/how-a-polyamorous-toronto-man-is-managing-his-four-romantic-relationships-remotely/ |archive-date=July 2, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref> a style of polyamory in which all members of a particular [[polycule]] are comfortable and connected enough with each other that it is not uncommon for them to literally gather around the kitchen table, as they may spend holidays, birthdays, or other important times together as a large group. This style emphasizes family-style connections, and not all members are necessarily sexually or romantically involved with every other person in the group.<ref name=":6">{{Cite journal|last1=Bergdall|first1=Melissa K.|last2=Blumer|first2=Markie L. C.|s2cid=143233814|date=January 2, 2015|title=More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory, by Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert|journal=Journal of Feminist Family Therapy|volume=27|issue=1|pages=40–45|doi=10.1080/08952833.2015.1005963|issn=0895-2833}}</ref><ref name=":7">{{Cite book|title=More than two : a practical guide to ethical polyamory|last1=Veaux|first1=Franklin|last2=Rickert|first2=Eve|isbn=9780991399703|oclc=878396611|year=2014|publisher=Thorntree Press }}</ref> 

Other styles of polyamory include '''parallel polyamory''', where members of individual relationships prefer not to meet or know details of their partners' other relationships,<ref name=":6" /><ref name=":7" /> '''solo polyamory''' defines non-monogamous individuals who do not want a primary partner<ref>{{Cite journal |last=Zimmerman |first=Kevin J. |date=July 2012 |title=Clients in Sexually Open Relationships: Considerations for Therapists |url=http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/08952833.2012.648143 |journal=Journal of Feminist Family Therapy |language=en |volume=24 |issue=3 |pages=272–289 |doi=10.1080/08952833.2012.648143 |issn=0895-2833}}</ref> and may resist the "relationship escalator" (an idea that relationships must follow a progression, or "escalator" from dating, to being exclusive, to becoming engaged, getting married, and having children).<ref name="auto">{{cite web|url=https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201310/solo-polyamory-singleish-single-poly|title=Solo Polyamory, Singleish, Single & Poly|last=Sheff|first=Elisabeth A.|date=October 14, 2013|website=[[Psychology Today]]|archive-url=https://archive.today/20201224202156/https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201310/solo-polyamory-singleish-single-poly|archive-date=December 24, 2020|url-status=live|access-date=December 24, 2020}}</ref><ref name="auto5">{{cite web |last=Dodgson |first=Lindsay |url=https://www.insider.com/dark-side-of-polyamory-2019-2 |title=There's a dark side of polyamory that nobody talks about |date=February 19, 2019 |website=[[Insider Inc.|Insider]] |archive-url=https://archive.today/20200625233415/https://www.insider.com/dark-side-of-polyamory-2019-2 |archive-date=June 25, 2020 |url-status=live |access-date=December 24, 2020 }}</ref> For some, polyamory functions as an umbrella term for the multiple approaches of 'responsible non-monogamy'.<ref name="Fidelity" /> A secret sexual relationship that violates those accords would be seen as a breach of fidelity. Polyamorists generally base definitions of ''commitment'' on considerations other than sexual exclusivity, e.g., "trust and honesty" or "growing old together".<ref>{{cite web |first=Elaine |last=Cook |title=Commitment in Polyamorous Relationships |url=http://www.aphroweb.net/papers/thesis/index.htm |year=2005 |access-date=July 10, 2006 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20061004143344/http://aphroweb.net/papers/thesis/index.htm |archive-date=October 4, 2006 |url-status=live }}</ref> In an article in ''[[Men's Health]]'', Zachary Zane states that commitment in a polyamorous relationship means that "you will be there for that person", supporting them, taking care of them, and loving them.<ref>{{cite web |url=https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a34823557/commitment-polyamorous-relationship/ |title=I'm in a Loving, Committed Relationship. I'm Also Polyamorous |last=Zane |first=Zachary |date=December 9, 2020 |website=[[Men's Health]] |access-date=December 24, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201216233451/https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a34823557/commitment-polyamorous-relationship/ |archive-date=December 16, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref>

=== Communication and negotiation ===
Because there is no "standard model" for polyamorous relationships, and reliance upon common expectations may not be realistic, polyamorists advocate explicitly negotiating with all involved to establish the terms of their relationships and often emphasize that this should be an ongoing process of honest communication and respect. Polyamorists typically take a pragmatic approach to their relationships; many accept that sometimes they and their partners will make mistakes and fail to live up to these ideals and that communication is important for repairing any breaches.<ref name="polyoz_values" /><ref name="s.org" /> They also argue that polyamory is a response to challenges of relationships of a monogamous nature.<ref name="bennett" />

=== Trust, honesty, dignity, and respect ===
Polyamory has been defined as loving more than one person at once, with respect, trust, and honesty for all partners involved.<ref name="polyoz_values">From PolyOz glossary: "Not in the [linguistic roots of the term] but very important is the commitment to honesty with all partners, and openly negotiated ground rules." [http://polyoz.scm-rpg.com.au/postnuke2/index.php?module=ContentExpress&func=display&ceid=8&meid=-1 Scm-rpg.com] {{webarchive |url=https://web.archive.org/web/20090227071434/http://polyoz.scm-rpg.com.au/postnuke2/index.php?module=ContentExpress&func=display&ceid=8&meid=-1 |date=February 27, 2009 }}</ref><ref name="s.org">From [https://archive.today/20120909091614/http://www.sexuality.org/book/ sexuality.org]: "Two of the cultural cornerstones of the polyamory community are honesty and communication: it's expected that you and your existing long-term partner(s) will have talked over what you're comfortable with and what you aren't comfortable with, and that nobody is going around behind anyone else's back."</ref><ref name="mcchal">{{cite journal |last1=McCullough |first1=Derek |last2=Hall |first2=David S. |date=February 27, 2003 |title=Polyamory – What it is and what it isn't |url=http://www.ejhs.org/volume6/polyamory.htm |journal=[[Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality]] |volume=6 |access-date=December 23, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201210093927/http://www.ejhs.org/volume6/polyamory.htm |archive-date=December 10, 2020 }}</ref> Ideally, a partner's partners are accepted as part of that person's life rather than merely tolerated, and usually a relationship that requires deception or a "don't-ask-don't-tell" policy is seen as a less than ideal model.
''[[Out (magazine)|Out]]'' additionally described polyamory as "not a sexuality" but as actually "having multiple intimate relationships".<ref>{{cite web |url=https://www.out.com/music/2020/12/03/yungblud-opens-about-sexuality-talks-male-hookups |title=YungBlud Opens Up About Sexuality, Talks Male Hookups |last=Street |first=Mikelle |date=December 3, 2020 |website=[[Out (magazine)|Out]] |access-date=December 14, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201203154115/https://www.out.com/music/2020/12/03/yungblud-opens-about-sexuality-talks-male-hookups |archive-date=December 3, 2020 |url-status=live}}</ref>

=== Non-possessiveness ===
Some polyamorists view excessive restrictions on other deep relationships as less than desirable, as such restrictions can be used to replace trust with a framework of ownership and control. It is usually preferred or encouraged that a polyamorist strive to view their partners' other significant others, often referred to as [[Metamour|metamours]] or OSOs,<ref name="Black and Poly 2017">{{cite web |title=Black and Poly Dictionary |website=Black and Poly |date=November 13, 2017 |url=http://blackandpoly.org/dictionary |access-date=May 10, 2010 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20190701004527/http://blackandpoly.org/dictionary/ |archive-date=July 1, 2019 |url-status=live }}</ref> in terms of the gain to their partners' lives rather than a threat to their own ([[#Compersion|compersion]]). Therefore, jealousy and possessiveness are generally viewed not so much as something to avoid or structure the relationships around but as responses that should be explored, understood, and resolved within each individual, with compersion as a goal.<ref>{{Cite journal|last=Attridge|first=Mark|date=February 4, 2013|title=Jealousy and Relationship Closeness|journal=SAGE Open|volume=3|issue=1|page=215824401347605|doi=10.1177/2158244013476054|doi-access=free}}</ref> This is related to one of the types of polyamory, which is non-hierarchical, where "no one relationship is prioritized above the rest"<ref name="weiger" /> and the fact that polyamorists insist on working through problems in their relationships "through open communication, patience, and honesty."<ref name="bennett" />

===Compersion<!--'Compersion' redirects here-->===
{{See also|Mudita}}

'''Compersion'''<!--boldface per WP:R#PLA--> is a term coined by members of the polyamorous community to describe an [[empathetic]] state of happiness and joy experienced when another individual experiences happiness and joy.<ref>{{cite journal |last1=Balzarini |first1=Rhonda N. |last2=McDonald |first2=James N. |last3=Kohut |first3=Taylor |last4=Lehmiller |first4=Justin J. |last5=Holmes |first5=Bjarne M. |last6=Harman |first6=Jennifer J. |date=2021-05-01 |title=Compersion: When Jealousy-Inducing Situations Don't (Just) Induce Jealousy |url=https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-020-01853-1 |journal=Archives of Sexual Behavior |volume=50 |issue=4 |pages=1311–1324 |doi=10.1007/s10508-020-01853-1 |pmid=34041641 |issn=1573-2800}}</ref><ref>{{cite encyclopedia |last1=Thouin-Savard |first1=Marie I. |title=Compersion |date=2023 |encyclopedia=Encyclopedia of Sexual Psychology and Behavior |pages=1–7 |editor-last=Shackelford |editor-first=Todd K. |url=https://link.springer.com/referenceworkentry/10.1007/978-3-031-08956-5_2472-1 |access-date=2024-08-17 |location=Cham |publisher=Springer International Publishing |doi=10.1007/978-3-031-08956-5_2472-1 |isbn=978-3-031-08956-5 |last2=Flicker |first2=Sharon M.}}</ref><ref>{{cite journal |last1=Buczel |first1=Klara Austeja |last2=Szyszka |first2=Paulina D. |last3=Mara |first3=Izu |date=2024-07-01 |title=Exploring Compersion: A Study on Polish Consensually Non-Monogamous Individuals and Adaptation of the COMPERSe Questionnaire |journal=Archives of Sexual Behavior |volume=53 |issue=8 |pages=3285–3307 |doi=10.1007/s10508-024-02930-5 |pmid=38951409 |issn=1573-2800|pmc=11335843 }}</ref> In the context of polyamorous relationships, it describes positive feelings experienced by an individual when their intimate partner is enjoying another relationship.<ref name="mcchal" /><ref>{{cite journal |url=http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201312/jealousy-and-compersion-multiple-partners-1 |title=Jealousy and Compersion with Multiple Partners – How polys deal with jealousy and feel happy when their lover loves someone else |last=Sheff |first=Elisabeth |date=December 17, 2013 |journal=[[Psychology Today]] |access-date=June 28, 2014 |archive-date=June 29, 2014 |archive-url=https://archive.today/20140629144809/http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201312/jealousy-and-compersion-multiple-partners-1 |url-status=live }}</ref><ref name="PolySoc" /> It has been variously described as "the opposite or flip side of jealousy",<ref name="PolyOz">{{Cite web|url=http://polyoz.net.au/component/glossary/Poly-Terms-and-Concepts-1/C/Compersion-5/|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20121101141159/http://polyoz.net.au/component/glossary/Poly-Terms-and-Concepts-1/C/Compersion-5/|url-status=dead|title=PolyOz &#124; Compersion &#124; Poly Terms and Concepts|archive-date=November 1, 2012}}</ref> analogous to the "joy parents feel when their children get married",<ref>{{cite web | title = The Inn Between | url = http://www.theinnbetween.net/polyterms.html | first = Joreth | last = InnKeeper | access-date = March 31, 2014 | archive-url = https://web.archive.org/web/20140410071143/http://www.theinnbetween.net/polyterms.html | archive-date = April 10, 2014 | url-status = live }}</ref> and a "positive emotional reaction to a lover's other relationship".<ref name=":7" /> The term is traced to the [[Kerista Commune]] in [[San Francisco]].<ref name="PolySoc">{{cite web |title=Polyamory Society Glossary |url=http://www.polyamorysociety.org/glossary.html |access-date=December 26, 2006 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20130807030556/http://www.polyamorysociety.org/glossary.html |archive-date=August 7, 2013 |url-status=live }}</ref><ref name="Anapol">{{Cite book |last=Anapol |first=Deborah M |year=1997 |title=Polyamory: The New Love Without Limits |publisher=IntinNet Resource Center |location=San Rafael, CA |pages=49–64}}</ref>{{sfn |Taormino |2008 |p=217}}

===Difficulties===
Morin (1999) and Fleckenstein (2014) noted that certain conditions are favorable to good experiences with polyamory but that these differ from the general population.<ref name="Shernoff">{{cite journal | last=Shernoff | first=M | title=Negotiated nonmonogamy and male couples. | journal=Family Process | volume=45 | issue=4 | year=2006 | issn=0014-7370 | pmid=17220111 | pages=407–18 | url=http://www.familyprocess.org/Data/featured_articles/65_shernoff.pdf | archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20130429022859/http://www.familyprocess.org/Data/featured_articles/65_shernoff.pdf |archive-date=2013-04-29| doi=10.1111/j.1545-5300.2006.00179.x }}</ref><ref name="Fleckenstein Cox pp. 94–116">{{cite journal | last1=Fleckenstein | first1=James R. | last2=Cox | first2=Derrell W. | s2cid=144311126 | title=The association of an open relationship orientation with health and happiness in a sample of older US adults | journal=Sexual and Relationship Therapy | volume=30 | issue=1 | date=November 18, 2014 | issn=1468-1994 | doi=10.1080/14681994.2014.976997 | pages=94–116 | quote=Regression analyses suggest that the factors which predict better health and happiness differ between the general population and those who participate in consensually non-exclusive sexual relationships}}</ref> Heavy public promotion of polyamory can have the unintended effect of attracting people to it for whom it is not well-suited. Unequal power dynamics, such as financial dependence, can also inappropriately influence a person to agree to a polyamorous relationship against their true desires. Even in more equal power-dynamic relationships, the reluctant partner may feel coerced into a proposed non-monogamous arrangement due to the implication that if they refuse, the proposer will pursue other partners anyway, will break off the relationship, or that the one refusing will be accused of intolerance and not being open-minded.<ref name="Sizemore">{{cite journal | last1=Sizemore | first1=Kayla M. | last2=Olmstead | first2=Spencer B. | s2cid=4030065 | title=Willingness of Emerging Adults to Engage in Consensual Non-Monogamy: A Mixed-Methods Analysis | journal=Archives of Sexual Behavior | volume=47 | issue=5 | date=October 6, 2017 | issn=0004-0002 | doi=10.1007/s10508-017-1075-5 | pmid=28986760 | pages=1423–1438 | quote= The final reason given by those in the 'Willing' group was that their engagement in CNM would be a sacrifice for their partner or for their relationship. This group of participants indicated that despite their own lack of desire to engage in CNM, they would be willing to try CNM for their partner or their relationship.}}</ref>

Polyamorous relationships present practical pitfalls. One common complaint from participants is time management, as more partners mean one must divide one's time and attention between them, leaving less for each.<ref name="Masters">{{cite book | last=Masters | first=Robert | title=Transformation through intimacy: the journey toward awakened monogamy | publisher=North Atlantic Books | location=Berkeley, Calif | year=2011 | isbn=978-1-58394-388-5 | oclc=793850748 | pages=23–25}}</ref> Related is that the complexity of the arrangement can lead to so much effort being spent on the relationship that personal, individual needs can be overlooked.<ref name="Brunning 2016">{{cite journal | last=Brunning | first=Luke | title=The Distinctiveness of Polyamory | journal=Journal of Applied Philosophy | volume=35 | issue=3 | year=2018 | issn=0264-3758 | doi=10.1111/japp.12240 | pages=15–16 | s2cid=147982689 | url=https://ora.ox.ac.uk/objects/uuid:355c60d9-818c-454c-8ed2-7320ccf540f9 | access-date=August 18, 2020 | archive-date=October 25, 2020 | archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20201025054226/https://ora.ox.ac.uk/objects/uuid:355c60d9-818c-454c-8ed2-7320ccf540f9 | url-status=live }}</ref> The strong emphasis on communication can unintentionally marginalize partners who are less articulate.<ref name="Brunning 2016"/> Finally, negotiating the sometimes complex rules and boundaries of these relationships can be emotionally taxing, as can reconciling situations where one partner goes outside those boundaries.<ref name="Brunning 2016"/><ref name="Masters"/>

The scientific studies of psychological well-being and relationship satisfaction for participants in polyamory have been limited due to mostly being a "hidden population." While some results could be interpreted as positive, these findings often suffer from bias and methodological issues.<ref name="Rubel Bogaert">{{cite journal | last1=Rubel | first1=Alicia N. | last2=Bogaert | first2=Anthony F. | s2cid=36510972 | title=Consensual Nonmonogamy: Psychological Well-Being and Relationship Quality Correlates | journal=The Journal of Sex Research | volume=52 | issue=9 | date=September 4, 2014 | issn=0022-4499 | doi=10.1080/00224499.2014.942722 | pmid=25189189 | pages=961–982}}</ref> A significant number of studies rely on [[Sample size determination|small samples]], often recruited from referrals, [[snowball sampling|snowball-sampling]], and websites devoted to polyamory.<ref name="Rubel Bogaert"/> Individuals recruited in this manner tend to be relatively homogeneous regarding values, beliefs, and demographics, which limits the generalizability of the findings. These samples also tend to be [[Self-selection bias|self-selecting]] toward individuals with positive experiences. In contrast, those who found polyamory to be distressing or hurtful might be more reluctant to participate in the research.<ref name="Rubel Bogaert"/> Most of the studies rely entirely on [[self-report study|self-report measures]]. Generally, self-reports of the degree of well-being and relationship satisfaction over time are flawed and are often based on belief rather than actual experience.<ref name="Rubel Bogaert"/> Self-report measures are also at risk of [[self-enhancement]] bias, as subjects may feel pressure to give positive responses about their well-being and relationship satisfaction in the face of [[stereotype threat]].<ref name="Rubel Bogaert"/>