Editing Digitiser (section)

==Regular characters==
Regular characters appeared on the service both to fill up space left by short reviews and letters, and also to flesh out the content provided by the writers.

'''The Man With a Long Chin''' (later renamed '''The Man''') - The Man kept a regular diary in which he would detail the job he had been doing that week, before (usually) getting fired at the end of the week. One of The Man's jobs saw him working in a burger bar. He was eventually fired when he replaced the toilet paper with gloves from the lost property box, and someone froze to death in the toilet.

'''The Man's Daddy''' (later renamed '''Daddy''') - a bizarre ant/elephant creature who declared himself to be a famous comedian. His jokes tended to be disjointed, usually relying on a nonsense answer or a far-fetched pun. His jokes included: '''''Question.''' Why did Superman wear his pants outside his trousers? '''Answer.''' Because he was a pervert.'', '''''Question.''': What do you call a dog wearing a policeman's hat? '''Answer''': PC Dog-hat'' and '''''Question.''': What do you say if there is a seed in your pie and a man in your yard? '''Answer''': "Seed pie leave now". ''

'''[[Mr. T]]''' - A take on Mr. T from [[The A-Team]], who would dispense worldly advice, while warning kids to stay away from his bins. His distinctive vocal style was brought across by the use of capitalisation of entire words in a sentence.

'''Phoning Honey''' - Would phone up stores in order to make prank calls, and present the transcript for readers' perusal.

'''Fat Sow''' - Presented the news page, and began every article with a wild insult, and a demand that the reader stop whatever they are doing to pay attention to the rant. Rose allegedly received a written warning when Teletext's editors deemed Fat Sow's comment "What's the matter lads - too fat and stupid to get into the army?" as "Grossly offensive towards security guards".

'''Zombie Dave''' - A reanimated corpse who appeared on the news page and punctuated the items with comments written in the manner of the shambling dead. This was frequently used as an excuse to get rude comments screened on the family-friendly service, such as when he described [[Tomb Raider]]'s [[Lara Croft]] as a "thrr brrrd wrrz thrr tttrrrdz" kind of sound.

'''Insincere Dave''' - A send-up of fanboys, marketing staff and ultra-positive reviewers; in particular the over enthusiastic Dave Gibbons who at that time was the games reviewer for the BBC [[Ceefax]] service. Dave would comment briefly on the news items of the day in an overly optimistic and enthusiastic fashion. Famously, any spare space on the line his comments occupied would be filled with exclamation marks, further emphasising his "sincerity." Example: on a story about a pink casing accessory for the [[Dreamcast]], Dave commented that, "Now your DC can be in the pink!!!!!!!". Very occasionally, a more deadpan Dave would appear: on a story regarding Microsoft's intention to ensure that the [[Xbox (console)|Xbox]] marketing budget outweighed [[Sony]]'s [[PlayStation 2|PS2]] expenditure, Dave remarked that, "Money is the most important thing." Dave's comments were usually preceded by a rather acid take on the day's gaming events, adding a further element of juxtaposition to Dave's enthusiasm.

'''The Snakes''' - A pair of beatboxing snakes, which would argue in a manner similar to that of [[Ali G]] (but pre-dating him by some years). Led to the catchphrase "I Cuss You Bad", along with the use of the word "Skank".<ref>[http://www.bubblegun.com/toons/snakes/index.html Snake City]</ref>

'''BW''' - A faceless quizmaster, who was a bizarre parody of Bamber Boozler, quizmaster of Teletext quiz [[Bamboozle (quiz)|Bamboozle]], often appearing to be nude.

'''Gossi the Dog''' - Perhaps ''Digitiser''{{'}}s most controversial character, Gossi hosted a regular gaming gossip page. On one occasion, the [[Broadcasting Standards Commission]] upheld a complaint about the Gossi page, which alluded to Gossi's master thrashing the talking cartoon dog with a belt.<ref>{{citation |url=http://www.ofcom.org.uk/static/archive/bsc/pdfs/bulletin/bulletin18.pdf |title=The Bulletin |date=25 February 1999 |accessdate=5 April 2010 |publisher=Broadcasting Standards Commission |page=4}}</ref> Gossi's page also led to the dismissal of Tim Moore, who - while Rose was away on paternity leave - printed an unsubstantiated rumour about a fellow games journalist [[Dave Perry]].<ref name="GAMES OF MY YEARS: DIGITISER - PART 7">{{Cite web|url=http://www.digitiser2000.com/1/post/2015/12/games-of-my-years-digitiser-part-seven-by-mr-biffo.html|title=GAMES OF MY YEARS: DIGITISER - PART SEVEN by Mr Biffo|website=DIGITISER|language=en|access-date=2019-08-09}}</ref>  Teletext's editors allegedly used the absence of Rose (who remained useful to the company for his graphic design abilities), and the journalist's complaint, as an excuse to fire Moore.<ref name ="GAMES OF MY YEARS: DIGITISER - PART 7"/>

'''Doctor Derek Doctors''' - A sinister megalomaniac, whom Biffo and Hairs secretly removed from air, after a concerned mother rang to say she found him "Perverted and disgusting".

'''Chester Fisho''' - Chester gave views on the news of the day laced with masses of sexual innuendo.{{Citation needed|date=March 2016}}