Editing Dominance and submission (section)

==Consent and contracts==
{{Further|topic=when consent can be a defense to criminal liability for any injuries caused, and when, for these purposes, non-physical injuries are included in the definition of [[grievous bodily harm]]|Consent (BDSM)|Consent (criminal){{!}}Legal consent}}
{{See also|Contract (BDSM)}}
[[File:Male submissive art.jpg|thumb|Artwork depicting a female dominant performing bondage on her male submissive.]]
'''Consent''' is a vital element in all psychological play, and consent can be granted in many ways. Some employ a written form known as a "Dungeon negotiation form", for others a simple verbal commitment is sufficient.<ref name=":0" /> Consent can be limited both in duration and content. There are many versions of consent but mainly it is the knowledge between the partnership of who plays the dominant role and who plays the submissive.<ref name=":0" /> The commitment of knowing who afflicts and receives the pain, bondage, torture, and/or humiliation. As well as the fact that all erotic experiences are performed in a safe, legal, and consensual practice as well as benefiting both parties.<ref name=":0" /> The consensual practice is what helps distinguish BDSM participants from a psychiatric diagnosis of a sexual disorder.<ref name=":0" /> The community of BDSM has adopted the saying "Safe, Sane, Consensual" (SSC) and "Risk-Aware Consensual Kink" (RACK) and a new addition "Caring, Communication, Consent, and Caution" (4Cs).<ref name=":0" /> Consent has also been categorized into three groups: surface, scene, and deep consent. Surface consent has been defined as a simple yes or no. Scene consent has been described as including parameters of a top/ bottom negotiation and agreement of a play scene.<ref name=":0" /> While deep consent involves the mental capacity of the bottom (submissive) and the awareness of the top that the bottom is able to use a safeword. The BDSM community have a simple code of conduct concerning the boundaries of safety and negotiation to ensure consensual BDSM.<ref name=":0" />

Negotiation in terms of the sexual scenes is required to ensure that the BDSM play is enjoyable and safe for both parties involved. The discussion of what activities are available and the mutual definition of the play is the only way both the dominant and submissive will be able to comfortably perform.<ref name=":0" /> There is a complexity to negotiation depending on the trust and emotional attachment the partners have towards each other, the more familiarity between the two the less negotiation needed.<ref name=":0" /> The extent of negotiation depends on the partner's involvement, for example, less risk behavior the less negotiation needed.<ref name=":0" />

Safewords are verbal codes both partners can recognize as the end or altering of activities done in a BDSM scene. It is an important asset to continue the consent through the relationship and scene itself.<ref name=":0" /> The use of a safeword at any time, regardless of the intensity of the scene, usually signifies the end to a scene, or activity and possible withdrawal of consent completely.<ref name=":0" /> Within the community of BDSM, there are universal safewords used according to traffic lights and known as "house safewords".<ref name=":0" /> Red means stop everything, yellow means slow down and to not go any further, and green meaning go and continue with more intensity.<ref name=":0" /> There are also possibilities where speaking is not an option and so there are "silent safewords" that are simple gestures that represent stopping an activity, for example, clapping hands, snapping fingers, or any action showing the scene must end.<ref name=":0" /> The use of safewords and the abode of them go hand and hand with consent and negotiation. All of it ensures a safe space where both participants are able to enjoy the sexual play.<ref name=":0" />

The BDSM community takes consent very seriously and promotes safe play.<ref name=":0" /> They provide many resources so people may learn how to respect consent, such as education, information, and safety. They also provide public playrooms with dungeon monitors to make sure the rules are kept and followed.<ref name=":0" /> They have consequences for people who break the built trust and disobey the rule of consent and boundaries. Some punishments include being blacklisted from the community and labeled as a "predator."<ref name=":0" /> Being blacklisted includes being personally ridiculed by individual members, as well as exclusion from play parties, clubs, and organizations held by the community.<ref name=":0" />

Although they take all the precautions to the events, coercion and sexual assault still occur inside and outside the community.<ref name=":0" /> There are many forms to this that include, knowingly violating consent, accidental violations, and misunderstandings from the lack of communication towards definitions and agreed-upon activities. The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) is an educational organization that is driven to propose positive and safe sex that was founded in 1997.<ref name=":0" /> They conducted a survey with 4,598 participants in BDSM and 1,307 of them reported being touched without consent.<ref name=":0" /> Out of the participants, 26% reported they were attacked by a predator and 33% said they were coerced. 81% of the sample said that during the activity they wanted it to stop.<ref name=":0" /> It is important to include that participants of BDSM are not more likely to be coerced or sexually assaulted, there is no significant relationship between the two. That being said just because someone participates in a dominant and submissive relationship does not mean they will eventually be sexually assaulted or coerced.<ref name=":2" />

'''Consensual non-consensuality''' is a mutual agreement to act as if consent has been [[waiver|waived]] within [[safe, sane and consensual|safe, sane]] limits. It is an agreement that consent is given in advance, sometimes without foreknowledge of the exact actions planned, though within defined limits subject to a safeword, reasonable care, common sense, or other restrictions. The consent is given with the intent of its being irrevocable under normal circumstances. As such, it is a show of extreme trust and understanding and is usually undertaken only by partners who know each other well, or otherwise agree to set clear, safe limits on their activities.

It is not unusual to grant consent only for an hour or for an evening. When a scene lasts for more than a few hours, it is common to draft a "scene contract" that defines what will happen and who is responsible for what. It is a good way to work out what all the parties want and usually improves the experience. Some contracts can become quite detailed and run for many pages, especially if a scene is to last a weekend or more.

For long term consent, a "slave contract" may be drawn up. Slave contracts are simply a way for consenting adults to define the nature of their relationship and clarify [[personal boundaries]], and are not intended to carry legal force.<ref>{{cite book |last=Makai |first=Michael |title=Domination & Submission: The BDSM Relationship Handbook |date=September 2013 |publisher=Createspace |isbn=978-1492775973|pages=162–171 |language=en}}</ref>

After a slave contract is drafted, some celebrate the event with a "collaring ceremony", in which the local D/s community is invited to witness the commitment made in the document. Some ceremonies become quite elaborate, and can be as involved as a wedding or any similar ritual.