Editing Intimate relationship (section)

=== Maintenance ===
Once an intimate relationship has been initiated, the relationship changes and develops over time, and the members may engage in commitment agreements and maintenance behaviors. In an ongoing relationship, couples must navigate protecting their own self-interest alongside the interest of maintaining the relationship.<ref name="Rusbult-2001">{{Cite book |last1=Rusbult |first1=Caryl E. |chapter-url=https://books.google.com/books?id=8it5AgAAQBAJ&dq=intimate+relationship+maintenance&pg=PA87 |title=Close Romantic Relationships: Maintenance and Enhancement |last2=Olsen |first2=Nils |last3=Davis |first3=Jody L. |last4=Harmon |first4=Peggy A. |date=2001 |publisher=Psychology Press |isbn=978-1-135-65942-4 |editor-last=Harvey |editor-first=John H. |language=en |chapter=Commitment and Relationship Maintenance Mechanisms |editor-last2=Wenzel |editor-first2=Amy}}</ref> This necessitates [[compromise]], sacrifice, and communication.<ref>Agnew, C. R., & VanderDrift, L. E. (2015). Relationship maintenance and dissolution. In M. Mikulincer, P. R. Shaver, J. A. Simpson, & [[J. F. Dovidio]] (Eds.), ''APA handbook of personality and social psychology, Vol. 3. Interpersonal relations'' (pp. 581–604). American Psychological Association. [https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2013-35884-021 https://doi.org/10.1037/14344-021]</ref> In general, feelings of intimacy and commitment increase as a relationship progresses, while [[Passion (emotion)|passion]] plateaus following the excitement of the early stages of the relationship.<ref>{{Cite journal |last=García |first=C.Y. |date=1998 |title=Temporal course of the basic components of love throughout relationships |url=https://www.psychologyinspain.com/content/reprints/1998/9.pdf |journal=Psychology in Spain |volume=2 |issue=1 |pages=76–86}}</ref>

Engaging in ongoing positive shared communication and activities is important for strengthening the relationship and increasing commitment and liking between partners. These maintenance behaviors can include providing assurances about commitment to the relationship, engaging in shared activities, openly disclosing thoughts and feelings, spending time with mutual friends, and contributing to shared responsibilities.<ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Stafford |first1=Laura |last2=Canary |first2=Daniel J. |date=1991 |title=Maintenance Strategies and Romantic Relationship Type, Gender and Relational Characteristics |url=http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0265407591082004 |journal=Journal of Social and Personal Relationships |language=en |volume=8 |issue=2 |pages=217–242 |doi=10.1177/0265407591082004 |s2cid=145391340 |issn=0265-4075|url-access=subscription }}</ref><ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Ogolsky |first1=Brian G. |last2=Bowers |first2=Jill R. |date=2013 |title=A meta-analytic review of relationship maintenance and its correlates |url=http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0265407512463338 |journal=Journal of Social and Personal Relationships |language=en |volume=30 |issue=3 |pages=343–367 |doi=10.1177/0265407512463338 |s2cid=145683192 |issn=0265-4075|url-access=subscription }}</ref> Physical intimacy including sexual behavior also increases feelings of closeness and satisfaction with the relationship.<ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Birnbaum |first1=Gurit E |last2=Finkel |first2=Eli J |date=2015 |title=The magnetism that holds us together: sexuality and relationship maintenance across relationship development |url=https://linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S2352250X14000104 |journal=Current Opinion in Psychology |language=en |volume=1 |pages=29–33 |doi=10.1016/j.copsyc.2014.11.009|url-access=subscription }}</ref> However, [[sexual desire and intimate relationships|sexual desire]] is often greatest early in a relationship, and may wax and wane as the relationship evolves.<ref>{{Citation |last1=Impett |first1=Emily A. |title=Sex as Relationship Maintenance |date=2019 |url=https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/relationship-maintenance/sex-as-relationship-maintenance/B18DA8207F0AE4F0F3B0A9B09D0D99F0 |work=Relationship Maintenance: Theory, Process, and Context |pages=215–239 |editor-last=Ogolsky |editor-first=Brian G. |access-date=2023-11-08 |series=Advances in Personal Relationships |place=Cambridge |publisher=Cambridge University Press |isbn=978-1-108-41985-7 |last2=Muise |first2=Amy |last3=Rosen |first3=Natalie O. |editor2-last=Monk |editor2-first=J. Kale}}</ref> Significant life events such as the birth of a child can drastically change the relationship and necessitate adaptation and new approaches to maintaining intimacy. The transition to parenthood can be a stressful period that is generally associated with a temporary decrease in healthy relationship functioning and a decline in sexual intimacy.<ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Doss |first1=Brian D |last2=Rhoades |first2=Galena K |date=2017-02-01 |title=The transition to parenthood: impact on couples' romantic relationships |url=https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2352250X16300276 |journal=Current Opinion in Psychology |series=Relationships and stress |volume=13 |pages=25–28 |doi=10.1016/j.copsyc.2016.04.003 |pmid=28813289 |issn=2352-250X|url-access=subscription }}</ref><ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Woolhouse |first1=Hannah |last2=McDonald |first2=Ellie |last3=Brown |first3=Stephanie |date=2012-12-01 |title=Women's experiences of sex and intimacy after childbirth: making the adjustment to motherhood |url=https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.3109/0167482X.2012.720314 |journal=Journal of Psychosomatic Obstetrics & Gynecology |language=en |volume=33 |issue=4 |pages=185–190 |doi=10.3109/0167482X.2012.720314 |pmid=22973871 |s2cid=37025280 |issn=0167-482X|url-access=subscription }}</ref>

==== Commitment ====
[[File:Edmund_Blair_Leighton_-_The_Wedding_Register.jpg|thumb|Marriage is a form of relationship maintenance that signals commitment between partners.]]
As a relationship develops, intimate partners often engage in commitment agreements, ceremonies, and behaviors to signal their intention to remain in the relationship.<ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Stanley |first1=Scott M. |last2=Rhoades |first2=Galena K. |last3=Whitton |first3=Sarah W. |date=2010 |title=Commitment: Functions, Formation, and the Securing of Romantic Attachment |journal=Journal of Family Theory & Review |language=en |volume=2 |issue=4 |pages=243–257 |doi=10.1111/j.1756-2589.2010.00060.x |issn= |pmc= 3039217|pmid=21339829}}</ref> This might include moving in together, sharing responsibilities or property, and getting [[Marriage|married]]. These commitment markers increase relationship stability because they create physical, financial, and symbolic barriers and consequences to dissolving the relationship.<ref>{{Cite book |last1=Rollie |first1=Stephanie S. |chapter-url=https://books.google.com/books?id=wGZlAgAAQBAJ&dq=marriage+and+relationship+dissolution+barrier&pg=PA223 |title=Handbook of Divorce and Relationship Dissolution |last2=Duck |first2=Steve |date=2013 |publisher=Psychology Press |isbn=978-1-317-82421-3 |editor-last=Fine |editor-first=Mark A. |language=en |chapter=Divorce and Dissolution of Romantic Relationships: Stage Models and Their Limitations |editor-last2=Harvey |editor-first2=John H.}}</ref> In general, increases in relationship satisfaction and investment are associated with increased commitment.<ref>{{Cite journal |last=Rusbult |first=Caryl E |date=1980 |title=Commitment and satisfaction in romantic associations: A test of the investment model |url=https://dx.doi.org/10.1016/0022-1031%2880%2990007-4 |journal=Journal of Experimental Social Psychology |volume=16 |issue=2 |pages=172–186 |doi=10.1016/0022-1031(80)90007-4 |s2cid=21707015 |issn=0022-1031|url-access=subscription }}</ref>

==== Evaluating the relationship ====
Individuals in intimate relationships evaluate the relative personal benefits and costs of being in the relationship, and this contributes to the decision to stay or leave. The [[investment model of commitment]] is a theoretical framework that suggests that an evaluation of relationship satisfaction, relationship investment, and the quality of alternatives to the relationship impact whether an individual remains in a relationship.<ref name="Rusbult-2001" />

Because relationships are rewarding and evolutionarily necessary, and rejection is a stressful process, people are generally biased toward making decisions that uphold and further facilitate intimate relationships.<ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Joel |first1=Samantha |last2=MacDonald |first2=Geoff |date=2021 |title=We're Not That Choosy: Emerging Evidence of a Progression Bias in Romantic Relationships |journal=Personality and Social Psychology Review |language=en |volume=25 |issue=4 |pages=317–343 |doi=10.1177/10888683211025860 |issn=1088-8683 |pmc=8597186 |pmid=34247524}}</ref> These biases can lead to distortions in the evaluation of a relationship. For instance, people in committed relationships tend to dismiss and derogate attractive alternative partners, thereby validating the decision to remain with their more attractive partner.<ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Ritter |first1=Simone M. |last2=Karremans |first2=Johan C. |last3=van Schie |first3=Hein T. |date=2010-07-01 |title=The role of self-regulation in derogating attractive alternatives |url=https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022103110000375 |journal=Journal of Experimental Social Psychology |volume=46 |issue=4 |pages=631–637 |doi=10.1016/j.jesp.2010.02.010 |issn=0022-1031|hdl=2066/90614 |hdl-access=free }}</ref>