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Just Shoot Me!
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===Dennis Finch=== The character of Dennis Quimby Finch, the executive assistant to Jack often referred to as simply "Finch", was portrayed by [[David Spade]]. Born in Albany, New York (of [[Norwegian people|Norwegian]] ancestry), Dennis attended Hudson River Junior College where he joined the [[cheerleading]] team. Dennis' father and brother are both firemen and they have suspected that Dennis may have been gay due to his effeminacy. In general, Finch has been described as "a self-centered horny pig who'd stop at nothing to get laid." He is discovered to be well endowed but does not realize this until Jack and Elliot bring it to his attention; they react with disgust when Finch says he always believed he was merely "a little above average" as he'd only seen other naked men in porn movies. Surreptitiously, Dennis writes articles for the "Dear Miss Pretty" advice column. Dennis used to compete in [[figure skating]], as revealed in the season 3 episode, 'Softball'. Dennis also likes to collect action figures and ceramic kittens. He lives in an apartment, number 803, in [[New York City]] ([[Manhattan]]), which was formerly Maya's apartment before she moved in with Elliot. He is also known to have a fear of owls from his mother's side. He works as the executive assistant of ''Blush'' owner [[Jack Gallo]], toward whom he has a slavish devotion (he once claimed he expected to be buried with Jack) and with whom he has a virtually telepathic rapport, enabling him to foresee Gallo's every need and provide answers to even his vaguest questions (e.g. "What's that song that I like?"). He also has a seemingly mystical ability to tell when something sexual is happening or even being mentioned; for example, he was able to figure out that Maya and Elliot were in a relationship simply by mentally comparing Elliot's bite mark on an apple he was eating with a hickey on Maya's neck, as well as seemingly appearing to cross a massive distance across countries to appear in a room just as Maya was propositioned by a photographer. In season 4, he marries a supermodel, Adrienne ([[Rebecca Romijn]]), although she asks for a divorce in the same season. Highly intelligent, as a child he was able to hack into a German bank and steal $18,000 worth of [[Deutsche Mark]] as disclosed in season 3; he also reveals in the season 2 episode "Jack's Old Partner" that he is so adept at twisting tax laws to favor him that the previous year, the IRS paid him $20,000 not to grow corn. In Season 6, episodes 2 and 3, it is discovered that his entire personality is stolen from a girl he saw at college on his first day at the freshmen mixer, Betsy Frayne ([[Amy Sedaris]]). This is revealed when she ends up working as a security guard for Blush.
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