Editing Cheese Shop sketch

{{short description|Monty Python sketch}}
{{Use dmy dates|date=October 2020}}
<!-- Deleted image removed: [[File:cheeseshop.jpg|thumb|[[Michael Palin]] (left) and [[John Cleese]] (right) of [[Monty Python]] performing the Cheese Shop sketch]] -->
The "'''Cheese Shop'''" is a sketch from ''[[Monty Python's Flying Circus]]''.<ref>{{Cite journal|journal = [[QJM]]|title = The professor of cheese|volume = 95|author = Launer|pmid = 11861965|doi = 10.1093/qjmed/95.2.133|page = 133|issue = 2|first = John|date = 1 February 2002|doi-access = free}}{{Open access}}</ref><ref>{{cite book|title = On the Discourse of Satire: Towards a Stylistic Model of Satirical Humor|author = Simpson|isbn = 90-272-3333-0|url = https://books.google.com/books?id=NCW_nvfiUQkC|year = 2003|publisher = John Benjamins|location = Amsterdam|page = 36|first = Paul|quote = Perhaps the gag ''par excellence'' of the Python public service encounter archive is the so-called "cheese shop" sketch.|via = Google Books (preview)}}</ref>

It originally appeared in episode 33, "[[List of Monty Python's Flying Circus episodes#Series 3 (1972–73)|Salad Days]]" on 30 November, 1972. The script for the sketch is included in the 1989 book ''The Complete Monty Python's Flying Circus: All the Words, Volume 2''.<ref>{{Cite book
  |last = Chapman|first = Graham|author-link = Graham Chapman|title = The Complete Monty Python's Flying Circus: All the Words, Volume 2|place = New York|publisher = [[Pantheon Books|Pantheon]]|year = 1989|page = 134|isbn = 0-679-72648-9|oclc = 54794550<!--additional identifiers are 19776021, 180665062, and 834138057-->}}</ref>

It was later reworked for the album ''[[The Monty Python Matching Tie and Handkerchief]]'' and appeared for one last time during ''[[Monty Python Live (Mostly)]]'', as a surprising coda to the [[Dead Parrot sketch]].

==Origins==
The idea for the sketch came after a day of shooting in [[Folkestone#Folkestone Harbour|Folkestone Harbour]], where [[John Cleese]] became [[motion sickness|seasick]] and threw up repeatedly while trying to deliver a line. During the drive back, [[Graham Chapman]] recommended that Cleese eat something and asked him what he wanted; Cleese replied that he fancied a piece of [[cheese]]. Upon seeing a [[dispensing chemist|chemist's shop]], Cleese pondered whether the shop would sell cheese, to which Chapman responded that if they did it would be medicinal cheese and that Cleese would need a prescription to buy some. Giggling, they decided to write a sketch based on that idea. However, on starting to write it, they concluded that asking for cheese in a chemist's shop was too unrealistic without being set up. Wondering why someone would attempt to buy cheese somewhere other than a cheese shop, Cleese thought that they should write a sketch about someone attempting to buy cheese in a cheese shop that had no cheese whatsoever to set up a sketch revolving around someone attempting to buy cheese at a chemist's which never wound up happening.<ref>{{citation |title=The British Table : A New Look at the Traditional Cooking of England, Scotland, and Wales |chapter=Saving British Cheese |author=Colman Andrews |year=2016 |isbn=9781613122112 |publisher=Abrams}}</ref>

Chapman then wrote the sketch with Cleese, who did not initially find it humorous. When Chapman insisted that it was funny, they presented it at a reading for the other Python members. Though most of the other Pythons were also unimpressed, [[Michael Palin]] loved it and laughed hysterically, eventually falling to the floor. This amused the others and they agreed to use the sketch.<ref>{{Cite AV media|url = https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMjQ-vyeYsg|title = Monty Python reunion NYC: Q&A about who wrote which sketch|last = digitalretro|date = 19 October 2009|type = HTML5|via = YouTube}}</ref>

==Summary==
Cleese plays an erudite customer (Mr. Mousebender in the script) attempting to purchase some cheese from "''Ye National Cheese Emporium'', purveyor of fine cheese to the gentry (and the poverty-stricken too)". The proprietor (Palin), Mr. Arthur Wensleydale (Henry Wensleydale in the TV version), appears to have nothing in stock, not even [[Cheddar cheese|cheddar]], "the single most popular cheese in the world". A slow crescendo of [[bouzouki]] music plays in the background performed by [[Joe Moretti]], as [[Terry Jones]] and [[Graham Chapman]] dance while dressed in [[bowler hat]]s and business suits. Cleese initially expresses appreciation of the music, being "one who delights in all manifestations of the [[Terpsichore]]an Muse", but as the sketch progresses it mirrors Cleese's growing frustration until he loudly demands the music cease. As Cleese lists increasingly obscure, unsavoury, and, in one instance fictional,<ref>Venezuelan Beaver Cheese is fictional (Annotated Flying Circus, Luke Dempsey, 2001)</ref> cheeses to no avail, the proprietor offers weak excuses such as "Ohh! The cat's eaten it."  Cleese remarks that it is not much of a cheese shop, but Palin insists it is the best in the district due to its cleanliness, to which Cleese replies "Well, it's certainly uncontaminated by cheese."  Eventually, Cleese asks if Palin has any cheese at all, to which Palin replies "yes". Cleese then tells him that he will ask the question again, and if Palin says "no", he will shoot him "through" the head. Palin answers "no" the second time, and Cleese immediately shoots him, then muses, "What a senseless waste of human life!"  He then puts on a [[Stetson]], and the sketch segues into [[Hugh Walpole]]'s ''Rogue Cheddar'' and a link to the [[Sam Peckinpah's "Salad Days"]] sketch.

==Cheeses==
Forty-three cheeses are mentioned in the original sketch. In the audio version on ''[[The Monty Python Matching Tie and Handkerchief]]'' album and other live and recorded versions, Cleese also mentions [[Feta|Greek feta]]. In the 2014 reunion show ''[[Monty Python Live (Mostly)]]'', Stinking Bishop, [[Chechil|Armenian string cheese]] and Zimbabwean rhinoceros milk cheese were also added to the list. "Venezuelan Beaver Cheese", mentioned in the original as well as future versions, is a fictitious type of cheese.

{{legend-table|width=auto
|#f8f9fa|Mentioned in original sketch
|lightsteelblue|Not mentioned in original sketch
|khaki|Mentioned together in one sentence, with only one reply
}}

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Cheese || Source
|-
| [[Red Leicester]] || Original
|-
| [[Tilsit cheese|Tilsit]] || Original
|-
| [[Caerphilly cheese|Caerphilly]] || Original
|-
| [[Bel Paese (cheese)|Bel Paese]] || Original
|-
| [[Red Windsor]] || Original
|-
| [[Stilton cheese|Stilton]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Gruyère cheese|Gruyère]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Emmental cheese|Emmental]] || Original
|-
| [[Jarlsberg cheese|Norwegian Jarlsberg]] || Original
|-
| [[Liptauer]] || Original
|-
| [[Lancashire cheese|Lancashire]] || Original
|-
| [[Stilton cheese|White Stilton]] || Original
|-
| [[Danish Blue]] || Original
|-
| [[Gloucester cheese|Double Gloucester]] || Original
|-
| [[Cheshire cheese|Cheshire]] || Original
|-
| [[Dorset Blue Vinney]]<ref>{{cite web|url=http://ask.metafilter.com/37352/Dorset-Blue-Vinney |title=Dorset Blue Vinney |publisher=Ask.metafilter.com |access-date=26 May 2011}}</ref> || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Brie]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Roquefort]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Pont-l'Évêque cheese|Pont l'Evêque]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Port Salut]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Beaufort (cheese)|Savoyard]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Saint-Paulin cheese|Saint-Paulin]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Carré de l'Est]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Boursin cheese|Boursin]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| [[Bleu de Bresse|Bresse-Bleu]] || Original
|- style="background:khaki;"
| Perle de Champagne || Original
|-
| [[Camembert]] || Original
|-
| [[Gouda cheese|Gouda]] || Original
|-
| [[Edam cheese|Edam]] || Original
|-
| Caithness || Original
|-
| [[Smoked cheese|Smoked]] Austrian || Original
|-
| [[Sage Derby]] || Original
|-
| [[Wensleydale cheese|Wensleydale]] || Original
|- style="background:lightsteelblue;"
| [[Feta|Greek feta]] || [[The Monty Python Matching Tie and Handkerchief|MT&H]]
|-
| [[Gorgonzola]] || Original
|-
| [[Parmesan]] || Original
|-
| [[Mozzarella]] || Original
|-
| Pipo Crem<ref>[http://www.chefsref.com/encyclop/IDPage165.html ChefsRef Encyclopedia – Cheese French] {{webarchive |url=https://web.archive.org/web/20090106104929/http://www.chefsref.com/encyclop/IDPage165.html |date=6 January 2009 }}</ref> || Original
|-
|[[Fynbo|Danish Fynbo]]  || Original
|-
| [[Abertam cheese|Czechoslovakian sheep's milk cheese]] || Original
|-
| Venezuelan beaver cheese || Original
|-
| [[Cheddar cheese|Cheddar]] ||  Original
|-
| [[Ilchester Cheese Company|Ilchester]] || Original
|-
| [[Limburger]] || Original
|- style="background:lightsteelblue;"
| [[Stinking Bishop (cheese)|Stinking Bishop]] || [[Monty Python Live (Mostly)|Live (Mostly)]] 
|-
| Any cheese at all || Original
|}

==Pastiches and parodies==
* The sketch was reworked for ''[[The Brand New Monty Python Bok]]'', becoming a two-player word game in which one player must keep naming different cheeses while the other player must keep coming up with different excuses; otherwise, "the Customer wins and may punch the Shopkeeper in the teeth".{{Citation needed|date=October 2023}}
* The [["Weird Al" Yankovic]] song "[[Albuquerque (song)|Albuquerque]]" parodies the sketch by portraying a similar situation in a doughnut shop. The scene ends when the shopkeeper reveals that all he has is a "box of one dozen starving, crazed weasels"; the main character purchases and opens it and is attacked by the creatures inside.<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.com-www.com/weirdal/albuquerque.html|title=Albuquerque}}</ref>
* A wheel of [[Brouère|Le Brouère cheese]] was flown aboard the first [[SpaceX Dragon 1]] reusable space capsule on 8 December 2010 in reference to this sketch. The presence of the space cheese was made known the day after the successful flight.<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.spaceflightnow.com/falcon9/002/cheese/|title=Space Cheese}}</ref>

==See also==
* [[List of British cheeses]]
* ''[[Smackout]]''
* [[Olympia Cafe]]

==References==
{{reflist}}

==External links==
* {{webarchive |url=https://web.archive.org/web/20120828195003/http://beavercheese.org:80/|date=28 August 2012|title=Tastings and pictures of the cheeses from the sketch}}
{{Monty Python}}

[[Category:Cheese]]
[[Category:Lists of cheeses]]
[[Category:Monty Python sketches]]
[[Category:Fiction about retailing]]