Editing Love triangle

{{Short description|Romantic relationship involving three people}}
{{Distinguish|Triangular theory of love|Ménage à trois|Karpman drama triangle}}
{{Other uses|Love triangle (disambiguation)}}
{{Biblio|date=October 2023}}
[[Image:Gianciotto Discovers Paolo and Francesca Jean Auguste Dominique Ingres.jpg|thumb|''[[Gianciotto Malatesta|Gianciotto]] Discovers [[Paolo Malatesta|Paolo]] and [[Francesca da Rimini|Francesca]]'' by [[Jean Auguste Dominique Ingres]]|alt=]]
{{Love sidebar|types}}
A '''love triangle'''<ref>Also called a '''romantic love triangle''' or a '''romance triangle'''.</ref> is a scenario or circumstance, usually depicted as a [[rivalry]], in which two people are pursuing or involved in a [[intimate relationship|romantic relationship]] with one person,<ref>{{cite encyclopedia |title=love triangle |encyclopedia=Cambridge Dictionary |year=2022 |last= |first= |publisher=Cambridge University Press |location= |id= |url=https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/love-triangle |access-date= |quote=A situation in which two people both love a third person: }}</ref><ref>{{cite encyclopedia |title=eternal triangle |encyclopedia=Dictionary of Americanisms, Briticisms, Canadianisms and Australianisms |year=2010 |last=Matyushenkov |first=V. S. |publisher=Xlibris Corporation |location= |isbn=9781450032469 |id= |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=44zE4w083mEC |access-date= |quote=A situation when two persons both love a third person, usu. of opposite sex.}}</ref><ref>{{cite encyclopedia |title=love triangle |encyclopedia=Oxford Dictionaries |date= |year= |last= |first= |publisher= |location= |id= |url=https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/love_triangle |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20220705191610/https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/love_triangle |url-status=dead |archive-date=July 5, 2022 |access-date= |quote=A state of affairs in which one person is romantically or sexually involved with two others (one or both of whom may not be aware of or complicit in the situation).}}</ref> or in which one person in a romantic relationship with someone is simultaneously pursuing or involved in a romantic relationship with someone else.<ref>{{cite encyclopedia |title=love triangle |encyclopedia=Macmillan Dictionary |year=2009–2022 |last= |first= |publisher=Macmillan Education Limited |location= |id= |url=https://www.macmillandictionary.com/dictionary/american/love-triangle |access-date= |quote=A situation in which one of the partners in a romantic or sexual relationship also loves someone else. }}</ref><ref>{{cite encyclopedia |title=Boulevard Theatre |encyclopedia=Dictionary of the Theatre: Terms, Concepts, and Analysis |year=1998 |last=Pavis |first=Patrice |publisher=University of Toronto Press |location= |isbn=9780802081636 |id= |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=tIXwrduoDMoC |access-date= |quote=For the pleasure of the entire family, this domestic tragedy/comedy revolves around the eternal triangle: Madame, Monsieur and the lover (or mistress). One topographical peculiarity is the all too frequent discovery of Monsieur (or Madame's lover) in shorts in the depths of a closet. The triangle is often adapted to the tastes of the day (introducing elements such as homosexuality, the timid appearance of infantile or mentally deficient characters, the eternal generation gap between the affluent character and the hippie).}}</ref><ref>{{cite encyclopedia |title=eternal triangle |encyclopedia=Lexico |year=2022 |last= |first= |publisher=Oxford University Press |location= |id= |url=https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/eternal_triangle |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20210410122810/https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/eternal_triangle |url-status=dead |archive-date=April 10, 2021 |access-date= |quote=A relationship between three people, typically a couple and the lover of one of them, involving sexual rivalry.}}</ref><ref>{{cite encyclopedia |title=love triangle |encyclopedia=Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English |date= |year= |last= |first= |publisher= |location= |id= |url=https://www.ldoceonline.com/dictionary/love-triangle |access-date= |quote=A situation in which someone is having a sexual relationship with the partner of a close friend.}}</ref> A love triangle typically is not conceived of as a situation in which one person loves a second person, who loves a third person, who loves the first person, or variations thereof.<ref>{{cite web |url=https://www.grammarphobia.com/blog/2012/10/love-triangle.html |title=Triangulating love |last1=O'Conner |first1=Patricia T. |last2=Kellerman |first2= Stewart |date=October 22, 2012 |website=Grammarphobia |publisher= |access-date= |quote=}}</ref>

Love triangles are a common [[list of narrative techniques|narrative device]] in theater, literature, and film. Statistics suggest that, in Western society, "Willingly or not, most adults have been involved in a love triangle."<ref name=pam1998>{{Cite book |last=Pam |first=Alvin |url=https://openlibrary.org/books/OL362453M/Splitting_up |title=Splitting up: enmeshment and estrangement in the process of divorce |date=1998 |publisher=Guilford Press |isbn=978-1-57230-367-6 |location=New York}}</ref>{{rp|149}}

The 1994 book ''Beliefs, Reasoning, and Decision Making'' states, "Although the romantic love triangle is formally identical to the friendship triad, as many have noted their actual implications are quite different&nbsp;... Romantic love is typically viewed as an exclusive relationship, whereas friendship is not."<ref>R. P. Abelson/R. C. Schank, ''Beliefs, Reasoning, and Decision-Making'' (1994), p. 223.</ref>

==History and definition==
The term "love triangle" generally connotes an arrangement unsuitable to one or more of the people involved.  One person typically ends up feeling betrayed at some point (e.g., "Person A is [[Jealousy|jealous]] of Person C who is having a relationship with Person B who, in Person A's eyes, is "their person.").<ref>David Cooper, ''The Death of the Family'' (Penguin 1974) p. 49</ref> A similar arrangement that is agreed upon by all parties is sometimes called a [[triad (relationship)|triad]], which is a type of ''[[polyamory]]'' even though polyamory usually implies sexual relations. Within the context of [[monogamy]], love triangles are inherently unstable, with [[unrequited love]] and jealousy as common themes. In most cases, the jealous or rejected first party ends a friendship – and sometimes even starts a fight with – the second party over the third-party love interest. Though rare, love triangles have been known to lead to [[murder]] or [[suicide]] committed by the actual or perceived rejected lover.

[[Psychoanalysis]] has explored "the theme of erotic love triangles and their roots in the [[Oedipus complex|Oedipal]] triangle".<ref name="auto">Johnson, p. 6</ref> Experience suggests that "a repeated pattern of forming or being caught in love triangle can be much dissolved by beginning to analyse the patterns of the childhood relationship to each parent in turn and to both parents as a couple".<ref name="auto" /> In such instances, "you find men who are attracted only by a married woman but who can't sustain the relationship if it threatens to become more than an affair. They ''need'' the husband to protect them from a ''full'' relationship...as women who repeatedly get involved with married men need the wives".<ref>Robin Skynner/John Cleese, ''Families and How to Survive Them'' (1994) pp. 268–269</ref>

==Common themes==
===Eternal triangle===
{{Other uses|Eternal triangle (disambiguation)}}
"In geometric terms, the eternal triangle can be represented as comprising three points – a jealous mate (A) in a relationship with an unfaithful partner (B) who has a lover (C)&nbsp;... A feels ''abandoned'', B is ''between'' two mates, and C is a ''catalyst'' for crisis in the union A-B".{{r|pam1998|p=148}}

It has been suggested that "a collusive network is always needed to keep the triangle eternal".{{r|pam1998|p=166}} This may take a tragic form – "I saw no prospect of its ending except with death – the death of one of three people"<ref>Rose Macaulay, ''The Towers of Trebizond'' (1990) p. 66</ref> – or alternately a comic one: "A man at the funeral of a friend's wife, with whom he has been carrying on an affair, breaks into tears and finally becomes hysterical, while the husband remains impassive. 'Calm yourself,' says the husband, 'I'll be marrying again'."<ref>G. Legman, ''Rationale of the Dirty Joke'', Vol, II (1973), p. 400.</ref>

===Homosociality===
It has been suggested that if men "share a sense of brotherhood and they allow a woman into their relationship, an [[isosceles triangle]] is created" automatically, as "in [[Truffaut]]'s film ''[[Jules et Jim]]''{{-"}}.<ref>Rebecca L. Copeland ed., ''Woman Critiqued'' (2006) p. 228</ref> [[René Girard]] has explored the role of envy and [[mimetic desire]] in such relationships, arguing that often the situation "subordinates a desired ''something'' to the ''someone'' who enjoys a privileged relationship with it".<ref>René Girard, ''A Theatre of Envy'', (Oxford 1991) p. 4.</ref> In such cases, 'it cannot be fair to blame the quarrel of the mimetic twins on a woman.&nbsp;... She is their common scapegoat'.<ref>Girard, p. 323-4</ref>

===Marital breakup===
When a love triangle results in the breakup of a marriage, it may often be followed by what has been called "the imposition of a 'defilement taboo'...the emotional demand imposed by a jealous ex-mate...to eschew any friendly or supportive contact with the rival in the triangle".{{r|pam1998|p=168}} The result is often to leave children gripped by "shadows from the past...they often take sides. Their loyalties are torn", and – except in the best of cases – "the one left 'injured' can easily sway the feelings of the children against acknowledging this new relationship".<ref>{{Cite book |last=Satir |first=Virginia |url=https://openlibrary.org/books/OL2064856M/The_new_peoplemaking |title=The new peoplemaking |date=1988 |publisher=Science and Behavior Books |isbn=978-0-8314-0070-5 |location=Mountain View, Calif |pages=181–184}}</ref>

As to gender responsibility, evidence would seem to indicate that in [[late modernity]] both sexes may equally well play the part of the "Other Person" – that "men and women love with equivalent passion as well as folly"{{r|pam1998|p=166}} and that certainly there is nothing to "suggest that a man is better able to control himself in a love triangle than a woman".<ref>Copeland, p. 47</ref> Stereotypically, the person at the center of a rivalrous love triangle is a woman, whereas for a split-object love triangle it is a man, due to the same reasons that [[polygyny]] is far more common than [[polyandry]].

Those who find themselves tempted to become the Other Man may, however, still find a cynic's advice from the 1930s pertinent on "the emotional position of the adulterer, and why to avoid it... ''Did I know what a mug's game was? – No. – 'A mug's game,' he told me, 'is breaking your back at midnight, trying to make another man's wife come''{{-"}}.<ref>Legman, pp. 432–433.</ref>

===Distinction===
A love triangle should not be confused with a [[ménage à trois]], a three-way relationship in which either all members are romantically involved with each other, or one member has relations with two others who are reconciled to the situation instead of being in conflict. Ménage à trois is French and directly translates to "household for three" meaning it is usually composed of a "married couple and a lover&nbsp;... who live together while sharing sexual relations". This differs from a love triangle because each participant is equally motivated purely by sexual desires.{{Citation needed|date=July 2022}}  The ménage à trois may be considered a subset of "The Sandwich&nbsp;... a straight three-handed operation&nbsp;... which may be operated with any assortment of sexes: three men, three women, two men and a woman ('''Ménage à trois''<nowiki/>'), or two women and a man ('The Tourist Sandwich')".<ref>Eric Berne, ''Sex in Human Loving'' (1970) p. 173</ref>

==In entertainment==
{{unreferenced section|date=November 2024}}
{{trivia section|date=November 2024}}
[[File:P.C. Barua and Jamuna - Bengali version of Devdas (1935).jpg|thumb|upright|Directed by Bengali language film director [[Pramathesh Barua]], [[Devdas (1935 film)|''Devdas'' (1935)]] pivots a tragic love triangle between Devdas, Paro, and Chandramukhi.<ref>{{Cite web |title=Devdas {{!}} Indian Cinema - The University of Iowa |url=https://indiancinema.sites.uiowa.edu/devdas |access-date=2025-03-22 |website=indiancinema.sites.uiowa.edu |language=en}}</ref> ]]
Love triangles are a popular theme in entertainment, especially romantic fiction, including [[opera]],<ref>{{Cite web |last=Ltd |first=Supercool |date=2025-03-21 |title=Love triangles in opera |url=https://wno.org.uk/news/love-triangles-in-opera |access-date=2025-03-22 |website=WNO |language=en}}</ref> [[romance novel]]s,<ref>{{Cite news |last=Grace |first=Adalyn |date=2023-11-29 |title=Electrifying Love Triangles Make These Y.A. Novels Irresistible |url=https://www.nytimes.com/2023/11/29/books/review/young-adult-romance-love-triangle-books.html |access-date=2025-03-22 |work=The New York Times |language=en-US |issn=0362-4331}}</ref> [[soap opera]]s, [[romantic comedy|romantic comedies]], [[manga]], [[tabloid talk shows]], and [[popular music]]. They are a major aspect of [[Indian television drama|Indian television shows]].<ref>{{Cite web |date=2024-08-20 |title=5 Best Hindi TV Shows with unforgettable love triangles: Ishq Mein Marjawan 2 to Ghum Hai Kisikey Pyaar Meiin |url=https://www.pinkvilla.com/tv/news/5-best-hindi-tv-shows-with-unforgettable-love-triangles-ishq-mein-marjawan-2-to-ghum-hai-kisikey-pyaar-meiin-1340880 |access-date=2025-03-22 |website=PINKVILLA |language=en}}</ref>

[[List of highest-grossing films|Three of the highest grossing movies of all time]] adjusted for inflation (''[[Gone with the Wind (film)|Gone with the Wind]]'', ''[[Titanic (1997 film)|Titanic]]''<ref>{{Cite web |last=Saab |first=Hannah |last2=Khatter |first2=Hazel |date=2022-07-15 |title=12 Best Romance Movies with a Love Triangle |url=https://collider.com/best-movies-with-a-love-triangle-trope/ |access-date=2025-03-22 |website=Collider |language=en}}</ref> and ''[[Doctor Zhivago (film)|Doctor Zhivago]]'') are romantic [[Epic film|epics]] that feature a love triangle at its core. [[Young adult literature]] has seen a rise in the popularity of the love triangle story structure (such as ''[[Twilight (novel series)|Twilight]]'' or ''[[The Selection]]''). But the love triangle story structure has been around since before early classic writers like [[William Shakespeare]] and [[Alexandre Dumas]]. Shakespeare's famous play ''[[Romeo and Juliet]]'' featured a love triangle between Juliet, Romeo, and Paris. Although more subtle, Dumas's classics ''[[The Count of Monte Cristo]]'' and ''[[The Three Musketeers]]'' also feature love triangles strong enough to seek revenge and start a war.

Bengali writer [[Bankim Chandra Chatterjee|Bankim Chandra Chattopadhyay]]'s 1865 novel ''[[Durgeshnandini]]'' also follows a love triangle between Jagat Singh (a [[Mughal Empire|Mughal]] General), Tilottama (the daughter of a Bengali feudal lord), and Ayesha (the daughter of a rebel Pathan leader against whom Jagat Singh was fighting).

In television shows, a love triangle is often prolonged, delaying final declarations of love between the pursued character and suitors that may prematurely end this dynamic or displease fans. Love triangles also featured prominently on [[soap operas]], and can span more than a decade, as shown by [[Taylor Hamilton]], [[Ridge Forrester]] and [[Brooke Logan]] on ''[[The Bold and the Beautiful]]'', or between [[Luke Spencer]], [[Laura Spencer (General Hospital)|Laura Spencer]], and [[Scotty Baldwin]] on ''[[General Hospital]]''. 

Warned of a love triangle by one of his prospective partners, [[Albert Einstein]] conceded to her that "You have more respect for the difficulties of triangular geometry than I, old mathematicus, have."<ref>Quoted in W. Isaacson, ''Einstein'' (2007) p. 361</ref>

==See also==
{{Portal|Psychology}}
* [[Adultery]]
* [[Affair]]
* [[Tennessee Waltz]]
* [[Ménage à trois]]
* [[Threesome]]
* [[Triangulation (psychology)]]
* [[Unicorn hunting]]
* [[Archie Comics]]

==References==
{{Reflist|2}}

==External links==
{{wiktionary|eternal triangle}}

{{Authority control}}

[[Category:Love]]
[[Category:Narrative techniques]]
[[Category:Sexual fidelity]]