Editing Open relationship

{{Short description|Interpersonal relationship to form of a non-monogamous relationship}}
{{Use dmy dates|date=November 2021}}
{{Polyamory sidebar|relationships}}
An '''open relationship''' is an [[intimate relationship]] that is sexually or romantically [[non-monogamous]]. An open relationship generally indicates a relationship where there is a primary emotional and intimate relationship between partners, who agree to at least the possibility of sexual or emotional intimacy with other people. The term "open relationship" is sometimes used interchangeably with the term [[polyamory]], but the two concepts are not identical. 

Open relationships include any type of romantic relationship (dating, marriage, etc.) that is open.<ref name="Collective2005" /> 
An "open" relationship means one or more parties have permission to be romantically or sexually involved with people outside of the relationship. This is opposed to the traditionally "closed" relationship, where both parties agree on being with one another exclusively. The concept of an open relationship has been recognized since the 1970s.<ref name="Web MD">{{Cite web |last=Doheny |first=Kathleen |title=The Truth About Open Marriage |url=http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/the-truth-about-open-marriage |access-date=8 June 2013 |publisher=Web MD}}</ref>

==Types==
To a large degree, open relationships are a generalization of the concept of a relationship beyond [[monogamous relationship]]s.<ref name="Taormino2008" />  A form of open relationship is the [[open marriage]], in which the participants in a marriage have an open relationship.<ref name="Taormino2008" />

There are several different styles of open relationships. Some examples include:

* Multi-partner relationships, between three or more partners where a sexual relationship does not occur between all of the parties involved.<ref name="Taormino2008" />
* Hybrid relationships, when one partner is nonmonogamous and the other is [[monogamous]].<ref name="Taormino2008" />
* [[#Swinging|Swinging]], in which singles or partners in a committed relationship engage in sexual activities with others as a recreational or social activity.

The main unifying element to open relationship styles is non-exclusivity of romantic or sexual relationships. Another generic term for all these types of relationships is open love.<ref>{{Cite web |last=Gaal |first=Anna Gyulai |date=21 February 2019 |title=The many shades of open love |url=http://www.exberliner.com/api/content/076876de-345d-11e9-a3c4-120e7ad5cf50/ |access-date=4 July 2019 |website=EXBERLINER.com |language=en-us}}</ref>

===Swinging===
{{main|Swinging (sexual practice)}}
Swinging is a form of open relationship in which the partners in a [[committed relationship]] engage in [[Human sexual activity|sexual activities]] with others at the same time. Swingers may regard the practice as a [[recreational sex|recreational]] or social activity<ref name="case_for_swingers">{{Cite journal |last1=Bergstrand |first1=Curtis |last2=Blevins Williams, Jennifer |date=10 October 2000 |title=Today's Alternative Marriage Styles: The Case of Swingers |url=http://www.ejhs.org/volume3/swing/body.htm |journal=Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality |volume=3 |access-date=24 January 2010}}</ref><ref>{{Cite web |title=Why Swing? |url=http://home.netcom.com/~jonnall/babylon/pattys.htm |url-status=dead |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20121104172156/http://home.netcom.com/~jonnall/babylon/pattys.htm |archive-date=4 November 2012 |access-date=4 October 2012}}</ref> that adds variety or excitement into their otherwise conventional sex lives or for curiosity. Swingers who engage in casual sex maintain that sex among swingers is often more frank and deliberative and therefore more honest than infidelity. Some couples see swinging as a healthy outlet and means to strengthen their relationship.

===Open marriage===
{{main|Open marriage}}
An [[open marriage]],<ref>{{Cite news |last=Dominus |first=Susan |date=11 May 2017 |title=Is an Open Marriage a Happier Marriage? |work=The New York Times |url=https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/11/magazine/is-an-open-marriage-a-happier-marriage.html}}</ref> sometimes referred to as consensual non-monogamy<ref>{{Cite web |date=26 May 2017 |title=Study Reveals 5 Benefits of an Open Marriage |url=https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/study-reveals-5-benefits-of-an-open-marriage_us_591b204ce4b086d2d0d8d2d7 |website=[[HuffPost]]}}</ref> or CNM, is a type of marriage wherein the involved parties unequivocally consent to their partners entering or engaging in romantic and/or sexual relationships with other people.<ref>{{Cite journal |last=Balzarini |first=R. |year=2017 |title=Perceptions of primary and secondary relationships in polyamory |journal=PLOS ONE |volume=12 |issue=5 |pages=e0177841 |bibcode=2017PLoSO..1277841B |doi=10.1371/journal.pone.0177841 |pmc=5436896 |pmid=28542619 |doi-access=free}}</ref>

===Polyamory===
{{main|Polyamory}}

Polyamory is the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and [[consent]] of everyone involved. While "open relationship" is sometimes used as a synonym for "polyamory" or "polyamorous relationship", the terms are not synonymous; polyamorous people may choose between open relationships or [[polyfidelity]]. The "open" in "open relationship" refers to the sexual aspect of a relationship, whereas "polyamory" refers to allowing bonds to form (which may be sexual or otherwise) as additional long-term relationships.<ref name="Taormino2008" />

The terms "polyamory" and "[[Casual dating|friends with benefits]]" are fairly recent, having come about within the past few decades<ref name="LinssenWik2010" /> though the concept is as old as society.

==Prevalence==
{{Globalize|section|date=February 2012}}
Some believe that open relationships occur more frequently in certain demographics, such as the young rather than the old in America, including, more specifically, the college-educated middle-class rather than the uneducated working-class, or people of certain ethnic and/or other racial minorities.<ref name="Hollander1974" /> According to the 2012 National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, 4% of respondents reported being in an open relationship.<ref name=":0">{{Cite journal |last1=Levine |first1=Ethan Czuy |last2=Herbenick |first2=Debby |last3=Martinez |first3=Omar |last4=Fu |first4=Tsung-Chieh |last5=Dodge |first5=Brian |date=July 2018 |title=Open Relationships, Nonconsensual Nonmonogamy, and Monogamy Among U.S. Adults: Findings from the 2012 National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior |journal=Archives of Sexual Behavior |language=en |volume=47 |issue=5 |pages=1439–1450 |doi=10.1007/s10508-018-1178-7 |pmid=29696552 |pmc=5958351 |issn=0004-0002}}</ref> It was also found that males and [[LGBT]] individuals are more likely to report being in an open relationship,<ref>{{cite web|url=https://drjarryd.medium.com/non-monogamy-b0402b5b8261|title=Non-Monogamy|author=Dr. Jarryd Thomas Willis|publisher=[[Medium (website)|Medium]]|date=20 February 2023|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20230408114925/https://drjarryd.medium.com/non-monogamy-b0402b5b8261|archive-date=2023-04-08|url-status=live}}</ref> with 33% of gay men, 23% of bisexual men, 5% of lesbian females, and 22% of bisexual females reporting an open relationship.<ref name=":0" />

A 1974 study showed that male students who either cohabit or live in a communal group are more likely to become involved in open relationships than females, and are still more interested in the concept than females even if not participating in open relationships.<ref name="Hollander1974" /> A survey taken by gay men's "health and life magazine", ''FS Magazine'', of the 1,006 gay men they surveyed 41% are in, or have previously experienced, an open relationship.  Of the men who are in an open relationship, 75% believe that open relationships are great.<ref>{{Cite news |last=Duffy |first=Nick |date=3 February 2016 |title=Nearly half of gay men have had an open relationship |work=[[PinkNews]] |url=http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2016/02/03/nearly-half-of-gay-men-have-had-an-open-relationship/ |access-date=6 February 2016}}</ref><ref>{{Cite news |last=Haggas |first=Stuart |date=February 2016 |title=Open Relationships Uncovered |work=FS Magazine |issue=152 |url=https://www.gmfa.org.uk/fs152-open-relationships-uncovered |access-date=6 February 2016}}</ref>

Many couples within open relationships are dual-career, meaning that both primary partners have a stable job and/or a career. Both men and women in these, especially in closed groups, are also more likely to be in managerial jobs.  Most also are either [[childfree]], or post child-rearing.<ref name="Ramey" />

==Reward vs. risk==
===Reasons for entering an open relationship===
<!-- unless sourc(s) provided, this is a bunch of OR -->
An open relationship may form for various reasons. These include:{{citation needed|date=April 2018}}
* liking another person but not wanting to end the old relationship
* pressure or coercion from the partner wishing for an open relationship
* being non-monogamous by nature (i.e. born that way){{citation needed|date=August 2020}}
* a difference emerging between two people in a relationship
* one partner realizing that they are unable to fulfill the other's needs<ref name="Taormino2008" />
* varying [[sex drive]] between partners<ref name="Taormino2008" />
* one or both partners desiring more freedom, companionship, intellectual variety, a variety of sexual partners,<ref name="Ramey1975" /> getting ahead career-wise or maintaining relationships
* a need for challenge: some people feel that their relationship is inadequate unless they are being challenged. Open relationships may create a sense of [[jealousy]], [[attachment theory|attachment]], or possessiveness, all of which are challenges for a relationship to work through.<ref name="Taormino2008" /> These emotions can also lead to greater [[self-awareness]] which may be seen as satisfying to those in open relationships.<ref name="Taormino2008" /> Some research has found that individuals in open relationships report less jealousy compared to those in monogamous relationships.<ref name=":2">{{Cite journal |last1=Parsons |first1=Jeffrey T. |last2=Starks |first2=Tyrel J. |last3=Gamarel |first3=Kristi E. |last4=Grov |first4=Christian |date=October 2012 |title=Non-monogamy and sexual relationship quality among same-sex male couples. |url=http://doi.apa.org/getdoi.cfm?doi=10.1037/a0029561 |journal=Journal of Family Psychology |language=en |volume=26 |issue=5 |pages=669–677 |doi=10.1037/a0029561 |pmid=22906124 |issn=1939-1293|url-access=subscription }}</ref>
* the enjoyment of [[new relationship energy]], the state of heightened emotional and sexual receptivity and excitement experienced during the formation of a new physical relationship<ref name="Taormino2008" />
* being able to meet other couples and individuals with a similar outlook with whom the participants can connect with on an intellectual and emotional level<ref name="Ramey" />
* being in a relationship of convenience, that is, one that is not primarily based on mutual feeling of love towards each other (anymore), but rather on economic or social factors (e.g.: the traditional practice of [[polyandry]] in rural [[Tibet]])
* distance – when partners live in separate parts of the world for part or all of the time
* sex may be more pleasing, and the participants may engage in it more frequently than those in an average couple<ref name="Ramey" />
* issues with sexual compatibility<ref>{{Cite web |last=Oberling |first=Vivian |date=2024-04-29 |title=Why Would Someone Want An Open Marriage: Psychological Insights |url=https://helloprenup.com/marriage/open-marriage-understanding-the-reasons-and-considerations-expert-advice/ |access-date=2024-05-16 |website=HelloPrenup |language=en-US}}</ref>
* increased trust that comes with boundary setting and communication<ref>{{Cite web |title=What is Ethical Non-Monogamy? ENM Relationships |url=https://www.attachmentproject.com/enm/ |access-date=2024-05-16 |website=Attachment Project |language=en-US}}</ref>
* increased intimacy that comes with open discussion around sexual desires and experiences<ref>{{Cite web |title=What is Ethical Non-Monogamy? ENM Relationships |url=https://www.attachmentproject.com/enm/ |access-date=2024-05-16 |website=Attachment Project |language=en-US}}</ref>

“It has been proposed that men (both gay and straight), in contrast to women, are able to cognitively separate sex from emotions (or love) in a process commonly termed compartmentalization.<ref>{{Cite book |last1=Banfield |first1=Sophie |title=Archives of Sexual Behaviou |last2=McCabe |first2=Marita P. |publisher=Springer |year=2001}}</ref>" This means it is not unusual for [[homosexual men]] to have open relationships, which means breaking the ‘norm’ of a committed and ‘typical’ heterosexual relationship. That is not to suggest that open relationships do not work; research has shown comparable relationship satisfaction for both monogamous and non-monogamous couples.<ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Rubel |first1=Alicia N. |last2=Bogaert |first2=Anthony F. |date=22 November 2015 |title=Consensual Nonmonogamy: Psychological Well-Being and Relationship Quality Correlates |url=https://doi.org/10.1080/00224499.2014.942722 |journal=The Journal of Sex Research |volume=52 |issue=9 |pages=961–982 |doi=10.1080/00224499.2014.942722 |issn=0022-4499 |pmid=25189189|s2cid=36510972 |url-access=subscription }}</ref><ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Blasband |first1=D |last2=Peplau |first2=L.A. |year=1986 |title=Sexual exclusivity versus openness in gay male couples |journal=Archives of Sexual Behavior |volume=14 |issue=5 |pages=395–412 |doi=10.1007/BF01542001 |pmid=4062537 |s2cid=20680876}}</ref> However, it could be that there is a lack of emotional investment in the relationship that makes it harder to navigate through tough times.

===Reasons for avoiding an open relationship===
Many couples consider open relationships, but choose not to follow through with the idea. If a person attempts to approach their committed monogamous partner about transitioning to an open relationship, the monogamous partner may convince or coerce them to either stay monogamous or pursue a new partner.<ref name="Taormino2008" /> There may also be concern that when beginning an open relationship, a partner may become only concerned in their personal development and pay less attention to their partner.<ref name="LinssenWik2010" />

Jealousy is often present in monogamous relationships, and adding one or more partners to the relationship may cause it to increase.<ref name="LinssenWik2010" /> Results of some studies have suggested that jealousy remains a problem in open relationships because the actual involvement of a third party is seen as a trigger.<ref name="Buunk1981" /> In Constantine & Constantine (1971), the researchers found that 80% of participants in [[Open marriage jealousy|open marriages]] had experienced jealousy at one point or another.<ref name="Buunk1981" />

Consensual nonmonogamous relationships have negative stereotypes around them, including less sexually fulfilling, more sexually risky, and less moral.<ref name=":0" /> These stereotypes are reinforced by [[mononormativity]], which is the belief that monogamous relationships are the most natural and culturally acceptable relationship.<ref name=":3">{{Cite journal |last1=Hutzler |first1=Kevin T. |last2=Giuliano |first2=Traci A. |last3=Herselman |first3=Jordan R. |last4=Johnson |first4=Sarah M. |date=2 April 2016 |title=Three's a crowd: public awareness and (mis)perceptions of polyamory |url=https://doi.org/10.1080/19419899.2015.1004102 |journal=Psychology & Sexuality |volume=7 |issue=2 |pages=69–87 |doi=10.1080/19419899.2015.1004102 |s2cid=144272136 |issn=1941-9899|url-access=subscription }}</ref>

Cultural pressure may also dissuade initiating or switching to an open relationship. There is a commonly held societal stereotype that those involved in open relationships are less committed or mature than those who are in monogamous relationships. Films, media, and self-help books present the message that to desire more than one partner means not having a "true" relationship. In the [[Aftermath of World War II|post-WWII]] 1950s-1970s, it was traditional to "date around" (with guidelines such not going out with one particular suitor twice in a row) until ready to start "going steady" (the onset of exclusivity and sexual exploration); since then, non-exclusive dating around has lost favour and going directly to steady (now known simply as exclusive dating) has been elevated instead.<ref name="Bailey1989" /> Desiring an open relationship in these days often claimed to be a phase that a person is passing through before being ready to "settle down".<ref name="Taormino2008" /> The logistics of an open relationship may be difficult to cope with, especially if the partners reside together, split finances, own property, or parent children.<ref name="Taormino2008" />

==== Sexually transmitted infection ====
{{Main|Sexually transmitted infection}}{{See also|safe sex|polyfidelity}}
Any sexual contact outside of a strictly [[monogamy|monogamous]] or [[polyfidelity|polyfidelitous]] relationship increases the possibility that one member of the group will contract a [[sexually transmitted infection]] and pass it into the group.

Neither [[Birth control#Barrier|barrier device]] use (such as [[condom]]s) nor more vigilant [[STI testing]] and vaccination can fully eliminate such risk,<ref>{{Cite book |last1=Hatcher |first1=Robert Anthony |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=txh0LpjjhkoC&pg=PA297 |title=Contraceptive Technology |last2=M.D |first2=Anita L. Nelson |publisher=Ardent Media |year=2007 |isbn=9781597080019 |pages=297–311 |language=en |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20170918185600/https://books.google.com/books?id=txh0LpjjhkoC&pg=PA297 |archive-date=18 September 2017 |url-status=live}}</ref> but can reduce the statistical increase attributable to nonmonogamy. Nevertheless, using data from the 2012 National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, Levine et al. (2018) found that individuals in open relationships reported more condom use in both vaginal and anal intercourse compared to monogamous couples.<ref name=":0" />

The development of [[Pre-exposure prophylaxis|PrEP]] has led to a decrease in risk for HIV infection by as much as 92%.<ref>{{Cite journal |last=Holmes |first=David |date=28 July 2012 |title=FDA paves the way for pre-exposure HIV prophylaxis |url=https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lancet/article/PIIS0140-6736(12)61235-5/abstract |journal=The Lancet |language=English |volume=380 |issue=9839 |pages=325 |doi=10.1016/S0140-6736(12)61235-5 |issn=0140-6736 |pmid=22852138|s2cid=7096469 |url-access=subscription }}</ref> If both partners are on PrEP, risk of HIV infection is diminished, even if there are multiple partners.

==Successful open relationships==
One of the most significant factors that aids a relationship in being successful is that it is about making the relationship fit the needs of all parties involved. No two open relationships will be the same, and the relationship will change due to the current circumstances at each specific moment. The style of the open relationship will mirror the parties' involved values, goals, desires, needs and philosophies.<ref name="Taormino2008" />

The most successful relationships have been those that take longer to establish. By taking the time to develop a clear idea of what both partners want out of the openness of a relationship, it allows the parties involved to self-reflect, process their emotions, deal with possible conflicts, and (for those transitioning from monogamy to nonmonogamy) find ways to cope with the change.<ref name="Taormino2008" />

Negotiating the details of the open relationship is important throughout the communication process. Topics that are commonly found in negotiations between couples include honesty, the level of maintenance, trust, boundaries and time management.<ref name="Watson" />

Other tools that couples utilize in the negotiation process include allowing partners to veto new relationships, prior permission, and interaction between partners. This helps to reassure each partner in the relationship that their opinion is important and matters. However, although ability to veto can be a useful tool in negotiation, a successful negotiation and open relationship can still occur without it. Some reject veto power because they believe it limits their partner from experiencing a new relationship and limits their freedom.<ref name="Taormino2008" />

===Boundaries===
Types of boundaries include physical, which is along the lines of not touching someone without permission being given; sexual boundaries; and emotional boundaries, which is avoiding the discussion of specific emotions.<ref name="Taormino2008" /> Boundaries help to set out rules for what is and is not acceptable to the members of the relationship. They also help people to feel safe and that they are just as important in the open relationship as their partners.<ref name="Taormino2008" />

Examples of boundaries that are set could include:<ref name="Taormino2008" />
* Who (geographically and interpersonally, such as in the community, friends, family, et cetera) could be an additional partner;
* What types of physical limits are placed on that relationship (kissing, dating, or other sexual activities);
* Whether sexual relations will take place in a separate bedroom, playroom or premises (e.g. hotel).

Some couples create a physical relationship contract. These can be useful in not only negotiating, but also clearly articulating the needs, wants, limits, expectations, and commitments that are expected of the parties involved.<ref name="Taormino2008" />

===Time management===
Adequate [[time management]] can contribute to the success of an open relationship. Even though having a serious commitment with one partner is common, negotiating the time spent among all partners is still important. Although the desire to give an unlimited amount of love, energy, and emotion to others is common, the limited amount of time in a day limits the actual time spent with each partner. Some find that if they cannot evenly distribute their time, they forego a partner.<ref name="Taormino2008" /> Time management can also be related to [[equity theory]], which stresses the importance of fairness in relationships.<ref name="Watson" />

==Research on open marriages==
===Positive outcomes===
Published 1974, a national study of sexuality conducted by Hunt found that relatively few people engage in swinging. Hunt attributed the low number of people in these open marriages to various social, psychological, and practical problems. Yet, some of these people "confirmed what the advocates and enthusiasts have claimed—namely, that marital swinging can provide physically intense experiences, that it can be immensely ego-gratifying and that it is a temporary release from confinement and responsibility and a brief chance to live out one's wildest fantasies" (pages 273–274).<ref name="Hunt, 1974" />

Some studies show that couples in open marriages can maintain satisfying relationships. Rubin observed no differences in marital adjustment between couples in open marriages and couples in sexually monogamous marriages.<ref name="Rubin, 1982">{{Cite journal |last=Rubin |first=Arline M. |date=December 1982 |title=Sexually open versus sexually exclusive marriage: a comparison of dyadic adjustment |journal=Alternative Lifestyles |publisher=[[Springer Science+Business Media|Springer]] |volume=5 |issue=2 |pages=101–108 |doi=10.1007/BF01083247 |s2cid=144809888}}</ref> Rubin and Adams reported no differences in marital satisfaction between couples in open marriages and couples in sexually monogamous relationships.<ref name="Rubin, Adams, 1986">{{Cite journal |last1=Rubin |first1=Arline M. |last2=Adams |first2=James R. |date=1986 |title=Outcomes of sexually open marriages |journal=[[Journal of Sex Research|The Journal of Sex Research]] |publisher=[[Taylor and Francis]] |volume=22 |issue=3 |pages=311–319 |doi=10.1080/00224498609551311}}</ref> Gilmartin likewise found no differences in marital satisfaction between sexually open and sexually monogamous couples.<ref name="Gilmartin, 1978">{{Cite book |last=Gilmartin |first=Brian G. |title=The Gilmartin report |publisher=Citadel Press |year=1978 |location=Citadel Press |oclc=4135878}}</ref> A study by Bergstrand and Willams found couples in open marriages had higher levels of satisfaction than couples in the general population.<ref name="Bergstrand, Williams, 2000">{{Cite journal |last1=Bergstrand |first1=Curtis |last2=Williams |first2=Jennifer Blevins |date=10 October 2000 |title=Today's alternative marriage styles: the case of swingers |url=http://www.ejhs.org/volume3/swing/body.htm |journal=[[Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality]] |publisher=[[Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality]] |volume=3 |access-date=26 July 2006}}</ref>

Some couples in open marriages report high levels of satisfaction with their relationships. A study conducted by Wolf found that 76 percent of couples in open marriages described the quality of their relationships as "better than average" or "outstanding".<ref name="Wolf, 1985">{{Cite book |last=Wolf |first=Timothy J. |title=Bisexualities: theory and research |publisher=Haworth Press |year=1985 |isbn=9780866564236 |editor-last=Klein |editor-first=Fred |location=New York |pages=135–148 |chapter=Men in marriages. Marriages of bisexual men |editor-last2=Wolf |editor-first2=Timothy J.}}</ref> Dixon found similarly high levels of marital satisfaction in a study of 100 bisexual and heterosexual husbands in open marriages.<ref name="Dixon, D, 1985">{{Cite book |last=Dixon |first=Dwight |title=Bisexualities: theory and research |publisher=Haworth Press |year=1985 |isbn=9780866564236 |editor-last=Klein |editor-first=Fred |location=New York |pages=209–222 |chapter=Perceived sexual satisfaction and marital happiness of bisexual and heterosexual swinging husbands |editor-last2=Wolf |editor-first2=Timothy J.}}</ref> In another study, Dixon observed that 80 percent of wives in open marriages rated their marital compatibility as "excellent" or "good", and 76 percent of the wives rated their sexual satisfaction as "excellent" or "good".<ref name="Dixon, JK, 1985">{{Cite book |last=Dixon |first=Joan K. |title=Bisexualities: theory and research |publisher=Haworth Press |year=1985 |isbn=9780866564236 |editor-last=Klein |editor-first=Fred |location=New York |pages=115–133 |chapter=Sexuality and relationship changes in married females following the commencement of bisexual activity |editor-last2=Wolf |editor-first2=Timothy J.}}</ref> Buunk has also reported high levels of satisfaction in couples in open marriages.<ref name="Buunk, 1980">{{Cite journal |last=Buunk |first=Bram |date=February 1980 |title=Extramarital sex in the Netherlands: Motivations in social and marital context |journal=Alternative Lifestyles |publisher=[[Springer Science+Business Media|Springer]] |volume=3 |issue=1 |pages=11–39 |doi=10.1007/BF01083027 |s2cid=140789761}}</ref> 
 
Some couples feel open marriage has increased their marital satisfaction. Bergstrand and Williams collected online questionnaires from 1092 people involved in swinging style open marriages.<ref name="Bergstrand, Williams, 2000" /> 
Among those people who said they were "somewhat unhappy" or "unhappy" with their marriages before swinging, around 80–90 percent said they were happier with their marriages after they started swinging. Nearly half of people who said they were "very happy" with their marriages before swinging claimed to be even happier with their marriages after swinging. Open marriage can in some cases increase marital satisfaction.

===Neutral outcomes===
Couples sometimes drop out of the open marriage lifestyle and return to sexual monogamy. In a five-year study of bisexuals, 80 percent of whom initially had open relationships, [[Martin S. Weinberg|Martin Weinberg]], [[Colin J. Williams]], and [[Douglas Pryor]] observed a definite shift towards sexual monogamy over time.<ref name="Weinberg, Williams, Pryor, 1995">{{Cite book |last1=Weinberg |first1=Martin S. |url=https://archive.org/details/dualattractionun00wein |title=Dual attraction: understanding bisexuality |last2=Williams |first2=Colin J. |last3=Pryor |first3=Douglas W. |publisher=Oxford University Press |year=1995 |isbn=9780195098419 |location=New York |url-access=registration}}</ref> When first interviewed, a majority of these bisexuals preferred sexual non-monogamy as their ideal form of romantic relationships. Five years later, around 60 percent had changed their views, and most of those who changed their views said sexual monogamy was their new ideal. Some of these changes were motivated by the emergence of the AIDS epidemic. Monogamy was seen as a way to avoid getting HIV/AIDS. But, for many, the shift to monogamy was due to a genuine change in what they sought in relationships. Their desire to be sexually monogamous had nothing to do with the AIDS epidemic.

Couples who try open marriages and decide to return to sexually monogamous marriages may be left with different feelings about open marriage. Some may have negative feelings about their open marriage experiences.<ref name="Gates, 2002">{{Cite book |last=Gates |first=Jennifer |title=Survivors of an open marriage |publisher=KiwE Publishing Ltd. |year=2001 |isbn=9781931195188 |location=Spokane, Washington}}</ref> Others may continue to "see nonmonogamy as possibly good for others but not for themselves".<ref name="Weinberg, Williams, Pryor, 1995" /> Overall, open marriage has a relatively neutral impact on these couples.  Rubin and Adams did not observe any difference in the risk of divorce for couples in open marriages and couples in sexually monogamous marriages.<ref name="Rubin, Adams, 1986" />

===Negative outcomes===
Couples in open marriages expose themselves to the potential for conflicts caused by jealousy. Studies have shown that 80 percent or more of couples in open marriages experience jealousy over their extramarital relationships.<ref name="Buunk, 1981">{{Cite journal |last=Buunk |first=Bram |date=August 1981 |title=Jealousy in sexually open marriages |journal=Alternative Lifestyles |publisher=[[Springer Science+Business Media|Springer]] |volume=4 |issue=3 |pages=357–372 |doi=10.1007/BF01257944 |s2cid=198498499}}</ref><ref name="Ramey, 1975">{{Cite journal |last=Ramey |first=James W. |date=October 1975 |title=Intimate groups and networks: Frequent consequence of sexually open marriage |journal=The Family Coordinator |publisher=[[American Psychological Association|APA]] via [[PsycNET]] |volume=24 |issue=4 |pages=515–530 |doi=10.2307/583035 |jstor=583035}}</ref> Jealousy with its roots in open marriage can lead to serious conflicts. For example, attempting to interfere with a rival relationship may make a partner angry. Insulting or berating a partner may provoke retaliatory responses. Demanding greater commitment may ignite arguments. Indeed, many studies have reported that conflict occurs during episodes of jealousy.<ref>{{Cite book |last1=White |first1=Gregory L. |url=https://archive.org/details/isbn_9780898623857 |title=Jealousy: theory, research, and clinical strategies |last2=Mullen |first2=Paul E. |publisher=Guilford Press |year=1989 |isbn=9780898625325 |location=New York, N.Y |url-access=registration}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last=Bryson |first=Jeff B. |title=The psychology of jealousy and envy |publisher=Guilford Press |year=1991 |isbn=9780898625554 |editor-last=Salovey |editor-first=Peter |location=New York |pages=1–45 |chapter=Modes of response to jealousy-evoking situations}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last=Buunk |first=Bram P. |title=The psychology of jealousy and envy |publisher=Guilford Press |year=1991 |isbn=9780898625554 |editor-last=Salovey |editor-first=Peter |location=New York |pages=148–177 |chapter=Jealousy in close relationships: an exchange-theoretical perspective}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last1=Guerrero |first1=Laura K. |title=The dark side of close relationships |last2=Andersen |first2=Peter A. |publisher=Taylor & Francis |year=1998 |isbn=9781410601117 |editor-last=Cupach |editor-first=William R. |location=Hoboken |pages=33–70 |chapter=The dark side of jealousy and envy: desire, delusion, desperation, and destructive communication |editor-last2=Spitzberg |editor-first2=Brian H.}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last=Hansen |first=Gary L. |title=The psychology of jealousy and envy |publisher=Guilford Press |year=1991 |isbn=9780898625554 |editor-last=Salovey |editor-first=Peter |location=New York |pages=211–230 |chapter=Jealousy: its conceptualization, measurement, and integration with family stress theory}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last1=Schaap |first1=Cas |title=Perspectives on marital interaction |last2=Buunk |first2=Bram |last3=Kerkstra |first3=Ada |publisher=Multilingual Matters |year=1988 |isbn=9780585175928 |editor-last=Noller |editor-first=Patricia |location=Clevedon, Avon, England |pages=203–244 |chapter=Marital conflict resolution |editor-last2=Fitzpatrick |editor-first2=Mary Anne |chapter-url=https://books.google.com/books?id=qTIPiyGuQ6gC&pg=PA203}}</ref> The conflicts caused by jealousy can seem overwhelming and damage relationships.

Even when jealousy is not an overwhelming problem, open relationships may cause other complications. Numerous authors have argued that open marriages disrupt relationships by interfering with intimacy and provoking insecurities.<ref name="Hunt, 1974" /><ref>{{Cite book |last=Levinger |first=George |title=Divorce and separation: context, causes, and consequences |publisher=Basic Books |year=1979 |isbn=9780465016822 |editor-last=Levinger |editor-first=George |location=New York |chapter=A social psychological perspective on marital dissolution |editor-last2=Moles |editor-first2=Oliver C. |chapter-url=https://archive.org/details/divorceseparatio00teds}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last=Bancroft |first=John |title=Human sexuality and its problems |publisher=Churchill Livingstone/Elsevier |year=2009 |isbn=9780443051616 |edition=3rd |location=Edinburgh New York}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last=Turner |first=Jeffrey S. |url=https://archive.org/details/encyclopediaofre0000turn |title=Encyclopedia of relationships across the lifespan |publisher=Greenwood Press |year=1996 |isbn=9780313295768 |location=Westport, Connecticut |url-access=registration}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last1=Olds |first1=Jacqueline |title=Marriage in motion: the natural ebb and flow of lasting relationships |last2=Schwartz |first2=Richard S. |publisher=Perseus Pub |year=2002 |isbn=9780738208305 |location=Cambridge, Massachusetts}}</ref>

Some couples report that open marriage contributed to their divorces. Janus and Janus asked divorced people to list the one primary reason for their divorces.<ref name="Janus, Janus, 1993">{{Cite book |last1=Janus |first1=Sam S. |url=https://archive.org/details/janusreportonsex00janu |title=The Janus report on sexual behavior |last2=Janus |first2=Cynthia L. |publisher=John Wiley & Sons |year=1993 |isbn=9780471525400 |location=New York}}</ref> Approximately 1 percent of men and 2 percent of women listed open marriage as the primary reason for their divorce. This seems like a small percentage, but keep in mind that only 1 to 6 percent of the population have open marriages.<ref name="Hunt, 1974">{{Cite book |last=Hunt |first=Morton M. |url=https://archive.org/details/sexualbehaviorin0000hunt |title=Sexual behavior in the 1970s |publisher=[[Playboy Press]] |year=1974 |isbn=9780872233935 |location=Chicago, Illinois |url-access=registration}}</ref><ref>{{Cite journal |last=Jenks |first=Richard J. |date=October 1998 |title=Swinging: a review of the literature |journal=[[Archives of Sexual Behavior]] |publisher=[[Springer Science+Business Media|Springer]] |volume=27 |issue=5 |pages=507–521 |doi=10.1023/A:1018708730945 |pmid=9795730 |s2cid=5971960}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book |last=Bartell |first=Gilbert D. |title=Group sex: an eyewitness report on the American way of swinging |publisher=New American Library |location=New York, NY |oclc=729322685}}</ref><ref>{{Cite journal |last1=Spanier |first1=Graham B. |last2=Cole |first2=Charles L. |date=March 1975 |title=Mate swapping: Perceptions, value orientations, and participation in a Midwestern community |journal=[[Archives of Sexual Behavior]] |publisher=[[Springer Science+Business Media|Springer]] |volume=4 |issue=2 |pages=143–159 |doi=10.1007/BF01541079 |pmid=1119933 |s2cid=35528363}}</ref> Open marriage is perceived as a primary cause of divorce in a substantial minority of the 1 to 6 percent of people who have open marriages.

The extent to which open marriage actually contributes to divorce remains uncertain. Blumstein and Schwartz note a slightly higher risk of divorce among couples who engage in extramarital sex, even if the couples agree to allow extramarital sex.<ref name="Blumstein, Schwartz, 1983">{{Cite book |last1=Blumstein |first1=Philip |title=American couples: money, work, sex |last2=Schwartz |first2=Pepper |publisher=William Morrow and Company |year=1985 |isbn=9780671523534 |location=New York, NY}}</ref>

==See also==
{{Portal|Human sexuality}}
* [[Casual relationship]]
* [[Forms of nonmonogamy]]
* [[Open marriage]]
* [[Unicorn hunting]]
* [[Yes no maybe list]]
{{Clear}}

==References==
{{reflist|refs=

<ref name="Collective2005">{{Cite book |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=xlx94hWpe6YC&pg=PA165 |title=Our bodies, ourselves: a new edition for a new era |date=19 April 2005 |publisher=Simon and Schuster |isbn=978-0-7432-5611-7 |pages=165– |access-date=25 November 2011}}</ref>

<ref name="LinssenWik2010">{{Cite book |last1=Linssen |first1=Leonie |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=gq1s3zxqPHUC&pg=PA11 |title=Love Unlimited: The Joys and Challenges of Open Relationships |last2=Stephan Wik |date=1 August 2010 |publisher=Findhorn Press |isbn=978-1-84409-183-6 |pages=11– |access-date=20 November 2011}}</ref>

<ref name="Taormino2008">{{Cite book |last=Taormino |first=Tristan |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=XZyo3x1wscMC&pg=PR13 |title=Opening up: a guide to creating and sustaining open relationships |date=1 May 2008 |publisher=[[Cleis Press]] |isbn=978-1-57344-295-4 |pages=13– |author-link=Tristan Taormino |access-date=20 November 2011}}</ref>

<ref name="Bailey1989">{{Cite book |last=Bailey |first=Beth |url=https://archive.org/details/fromfrontporchto00bail |title=From Front Porch to Back Seat: Courtship in Twentieth-Century America |date=1 August 1989 |publisher=[[Johns Hopkins University Press]] |isbn=978-0-80183-935-1 |url-access=registration}}</ref>

<ref name="Buunk1981">{{Cite journal |last=Buunk |first=Bram |date=August 1981 |title=Jealousy in sexually open marriages |journal=Alternative Lifestyles |publisher=[[Springer Science+Business Media|Springer]] |volume=4 |issue=3 |pages=357&ndash;372 |doi=10.1007/BF01257944 |s2cid=198498499}}</ref>

<ref name="Ramey">{{Cite journal |last=Ramey |first=James W. |date=July–August 1977 |title=The Sexual Bond: Alternative Life Styles |journal=Society |volume=14 |issue=5 |pages=43–47 |doi=10.1007/BF02700827 |s2cid=143634246}}</ref>

<ref name="Ramey1975">{{Cite journal |last=Ramey |first=James W. |date=October 1975 |title=Intimate Groups and Networks: Frequent Consequence of Sexually Open Marriage |journal=The Family Coordinator |volume=24 |issue=4 |pages=515–530 |doi=10.2307/583035 |jstor=583035}}</ref>

<ref name="Watson">{{Cite journal |last=Watson |first=Mary Ann |date=February 1981 |title=Sexually Open Marriage: Three Perspectives |journal=Alternative Lifestyles |volume=4 |issue=1 |pages=3–21 |doi=10.1007/BF01082086 |s2cid=146973141}}</ref>

<ref name="Hollander1974">{{Cite journal |last1=Hollander |first1=Elaine K. |last2=Howard M. Vollmer |date=1 September 1974 |title=Attitudes Toward "Open Marriage" Among College Students as Influenced by Place of Residence |journal=Youth & Society |volume=6 |issue=3 |pages=3–21 |doi=10.1177/0044118X7400600101 |s2cid=149350978}}</ref>
}}

==Further reading==
* Schott, O. (2014). In Praise of Open Relationships. On Love, Sex, Reason, and Happiness. Bertz + Fischer Publishing. {{ISBN|978-3-86505-725-9}}
* Blue, Violet. "Open relationships demystified: Violet Blue gets advice on coupling with 'eyes wide open'" in the ''[[San Francisco Chronicle]]'', 29 May 2008.
* {{Cite book |last=Gates |first=Jennifer |title=Survivors of an open marriage |publisher=KiwE Publishing Ltd. |year=2001 |isbn=9781931195188 |location=Spokane, Washington}}
* {{Cite journal |last=Rubin |first=Arline M. |date=December 1982 |title=Sexually open versus sexually exclusive marriage: a comparison of dyadic adjustment |journal=Alternative Lifestyles |publisher=[[Springer Science+Business Media|Springer]] |volume=5 |issue=2 |pages=101&ndash;108 |doi=10.1007/BF01083247 |s2cid=144809888}}
* {{Cite journal |last1=Rubin |first1=Arline M. |last2=Adams |first2=James R. |year=1986 |title=Outcomes of sexually open marriages |journal=[[Journal of Sex Research|The Journal of Sex Research]] |publisher=[[Taylor and Francis]] |volume=22 |issue=3 |pages=311&ndash;319 |doi=10.1080/00224498609551311}}
* Matik, Wendy-O. ''Redefining Our Relationships: Guidelines For Responsible Open Relationships''. Defiant Times Press, 2002. {{ISBN|978-1-58790-015-0}}

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{{DEFAULTSORT:Open Relationship}}
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